latest heat

2o11

2011-02-08T13:50:00.000-08:00

it's already february! and I'm still jobless. still clueless to what gonna happen to me next. Pray that's a good one.

I'm having insomnia now. Feeling kinda crap, tossing and turning trying to sleep. But hell no, I'm still fresh now blogging away. What a life! I even changed the position of my body so that I'm able to sleep peacefully. Still the same tho. ):

Honestly, I'm Very much in love with my boyfriend. But sometimes, I really can't stand the way he tried hard to win an argument! Cos he will never win!
I'm not saying that he don't have the right to feel right but at times, I dun feel right when he's right!
Get the drift?

Yes, I admitted that I'm an ego person. I have reasons to stay as ego as I can be cos I don't see why a person have to start annoying us with their attitudes when at the first place this ego person did not do anything wrong to them!
I'm saying that, they deserve this punishment!
Even so I'm sucha person, I play game fairly. I did not act smart to stay ego without any valid reason. I have a good heart okay.

We argued in a way that I will always be the one talking away and he will be the one keeping silent. I don't want to be the bad gf here. I just want him to know his mistakes. It may be a small matter to him but not to me. Oh by the way, I did apologized before putting down the phone if I'm to blame. He loves so much to hear me apologize cos I don't do that often! So I have changed! I apologized! Tada! -.-

That's not the case. The main thing is, I just want you to know that I care much about us. I don't want us to blame each other and having this arguments over and over again. I am very sad. As usual, I teared up after the hang-up. I'm not proud of that. I'm afraid that my tears would run out if we continue doing this.

Just for your info, it's not as tho we fights and argue every single day. It's the one moment no one expected it to happen. Well, that's life right?

Nonetheless, he's still my number one. He's still the one who can make me smile after every fights. He's still the one I need most of the time. He's still the one I would like to grow old with. He's still the one that joked about my nose. -.-
No matter what, you're still the person I fell in love with right from the start. Hope you would stay patient and put in more efforts for this relationship. Nutty needs Putty Okay?

Talking about that, next week gonna be our anniversary. I still don't have any idea what to present him. First place, where the hell am I gonna get the money from? Lol! Idiot. Now this is super fcking sad! )))):
Do I get a present even if u don't? Haha. Please!!!! ):

Just can't wait for the day to come. Hoping that this sweet handsome boifey of mine gonna ask me out for a date on that special day. Haha!

Gonna try to sleep again now. Brother alarm just rang! It's 6am in the morning yo!
Lotsa loveeeeeeeee! :)

2010-12-28T11:01:00.000-08:00

3 more days before 2011.

i dunno why. but it seems that im feeling the sadness and wanting to cry out loud flashing back the memories of dear 2010.

for others, 2010 has been the great year and treating them good.
im happy to read blogs with full of excitement and greatful for the
happy memories in 2010.

honestly, 2010, a rather bad and struggled moments for me to complete this circle.
a very sad and of cos, i dun wish to welcome the memories back to my life.

let's recap and let's my tears roll down like no one's business.

January.
all went well. still with my old job. but always tempted to leave the job.
it's killing me jus to do the same routine over and over again.
plus, it's a boring place to be.
relationship wise, i think it's still fine between me and him.
family, okay as well.

Feburary.
hanged on to the job, still. tempted again to quit. kept complaining to dear bf on how much i hate that job. EVERY SINGLE DAY!
endurance. but it faded at the end of every work's day.
my love for him grew even deeper and deeper.
it was our 1st year Anniversary on that very month.
he bought me the very first anni's card and couple's rings.
but sadly, i lost the ring.
i took my turn to surprise him with my couple's rings, my edition.
and that's when his turn to lost the new ring.
since then, i was seen wearing the ring that he bought. and he's wearing the ring that i bought till today. super cute somehow. the rings's not the matching pair. but who cares.
i bought him a mobile phone. sony ericsson in red. W550i i guess?
i should thank Matsah for his beautiful signature. haha.
note to self: celebrated 1st year Anniversary @ Kallang River. (:
i had no problem with family. me and mum became much closer by then but still not too close yet. im loving it tho.

March.
everytime march, it's bestfren's and daughter's birthday.the celebration was cool.
all the bestfren's day for me. bf came along.
had photos with the babies.
they labelled qira as my daughter. cos we got the same skin colour at that point of time. and name manje too.
i still hate my job. i cant recall when's the last day of work for me. it's either on feb or on this particular month. but i got a job right after i resigned.
relationship's good always. was busy planning for our Bali's vacation.
famiy's fine too i guess.

April.
I hate April the most. everything come crashing in at a go.
I started schooling, thats the best part. got a job for myself as a dental asst.
Bali's trip was cancelled due to bf's accident. it happened too fast and yet to recover from that grief.
one night before our trip bf met with an accident and he got hospitalised.
i was there for him. family and frens too.
i was too upset. really upset. but thank Allah, bf's safe and sound now.
spend the days in the hospital. not to forget, over at his place to look after him.
skipped classes jus to see him safe.
he didnt fail to make me happy eventho he's not okay. had late dinner at bedok and lunch at bukit panjang plaza.
that's the worst thing ever.
family's fine as always. mum being supportive. mum being sucha dear to cook food for us. matsah survived from endless working's days to feed us.
i thank him so very the much.

June.
bf's still not recovering yet. he stopped working and so am i. quitted my job due to low interest and wanted to be there for him always. upset with his family much.
we survived slowly. bf able to walk without the crunches. he ditched the crunches for goodness sake. still putting my whole efforts for him.
we went out without the bike. district 9 still under repair. we miss him so much.
financial unstable. but we survived. alhamdulillah.
family's been great. but dear matsah handled the family all by himself. i salute him for his efforts and faith for our family.

July.
i dunno when i got the another job. as a sales asst at novena under ELC. i had no choice but to stick with the job to survive thru. went to work with so not okay mood. but on the first day, bf send me to work. by public transport of cos. aliman was the one who accompained me for the interview.
bf went to school again. i moved out from his place soon enough after his foot recovered.
nothing much happened this month as bf and myself busy working. his bike came back. we named him, silly putty. cos he's so greeny and cute like that. bf surprised me by fetching me with his brother's bike as his foot cant do much moves at that time.
silly putty was with his brother. it was a tough decision and call for bf cos he had to find ways to bring his bike out again. he needed 4000 jus to get everything done.
thank his mum for forking up cash for the deposit. it was really a hard time for bf.
he forced himself to work partime in order to pay his bike's installment.
he even got himself another part time job under fatface. this i got to thank ayu.
he worked his ass off as much as he could.
i admired his strong will and capabilities.
i M.I.A from my job due to the long distance from home. by then, i regretted losing my old job. the one i got bored and it was a stupid mistake to leave it.
i cant rewind the story tho. yet again, i struggled and got really really depressed and stressed.
family still being supportive. matsah struggled and i got no choice but to find jobs again. but to no avail.

August.
the best month of my life. it's my 22nd's birthday. and so my pestie and cousins.
i dun feel the vibe at first cos with the rate that me and bf's going, i dun see anything special coming our way any soon. but i was super wrong. bf got his first pay for fatface and he treated me and bought me a SOLVIL TITUS watch. oh yes!!!!!
i was happy like hell! he brought me to cash studio and breakfast-ed over at swensens! i was HAPPY, honestly.
he was always the one making efforts to make me happy without me knowing it. i really appreciated his efforts. it really eased my stress feeling sumhow. thank u putera. ((:
celebrated it with much love.
not to forget, i got an Iphone! from my dear brother, matsah. i dunno how to thank him and he's always been there for me whenever i need him.
he helped me alot financially and mentally. he helped our family.
he's the MAN.

September.
Another unforgettable month. it was putera's 24th's birthday! matsah and i bought him a camera. it's also a reason for my dead old camera. so this present was meant to be shared! he was super happy of cos. and again, i had to thank matsah for this wonderful gift.
we celebrated it over at cash studio and then to cineleisure. booked a room for him and frens for ps3. his frens came over and surprised him with lovely cakes.
the night went out smoothly and by midnight, we watched movie.
he received his gift days after his bday. got him a teddy bear by the $1 machine all by myself. haha. for the very first time okay!
mum started to worry for me. mum started to ask around for job's vacancy. i dun blame anyone. i know it's my fault and i know i got to support her no matter what.
it has been really a tough life for me. i seeked jobs. went for interviews. went to CDC to get help.

October.
Tragedi October they say? well, i got used to the terms "nadhirah still searching for jobs". haiz. school back as per normal. at the new ITE CCK. some few new frens of cos. busy schooling getting to know more about HR. crazy subject i should say.
and met up with crazy peeps which i dun wish to be fren with. duhh!
hansem lecturer, LOL!
was still suffering from depression. eventho i dunno whether i really got that sickness. but dear wawa said that i am showing the signs.
still happily attached with putera. only that we did much quarelling and arguing all cos of $$$$$$$$$$$$. we lacked of communication. i mean the serious communication. i was crying myself to sleep every night thinking of my -.- life.
i did not or ever go through this kinda hardship in my life.
thats when i blame my dad. regretted of leaving the old job AGAIN.
hating my bf for dunno why. feeling of stress come and go. somewhat the feeling's like a BITCH!
i got one person who always noe how to soothe and understand me, it's my only bestfren, wawa. she was my diary and so am i. we communicate every day without fail thru SMSes. we did very well telling out about our stories everyday. i dun feel much pressurise and sad after ranting it to her. i love her so much. only god knows why.
she helped me financially too. i dunno how to repay all her kindness. she's my otherhalf.

November.
i got a job! WOW! it's a temp job. as an admin asst. did failing and such. met great people and learn how they work. adult kinda environment. very peace and mind ur own business kinda thing. i love it there. no pressure. only came late once and didnt turned up thrice? i was sick. haha. well, it was the best experience ever. with IE Singapore for a month. i did quite a good job. (:
i dun care whatever the job will be cos i noe i need the job badly to cover my spending. everyday eat old chang kee. met up with Emma, my old ITE fren. that beautiful funny soul. she was my lunch date for a month.
slowly i recovered from the sickness but it kept hunting me whenever im alone. i hate to admit it but i was missing my step dad very much. i know and can feel that if he were to be here with us, our family's progression would be much better than this. i jus miss him. )),:
i cried again whenever i felt the tense and loneliness.
bf being sucha dear once again for spending the right amount of time with me. everyday and everynight. he supported me through my journey in life. he's my strength. he volunteered to find my step dad for me too. how sweet.
i hope i can meet my Ayah soon. wanna hug him so tight. really.
bf got a new job too. he had to leave fat face cos the shop shutting in dec.
he worked at JTC under regisrty. alhamdulillah. he still handled 2 jobs at a go.
my superhero. but i pitied him at times. )):

December.
kinda hush season for me. as i had to leave IE and say hello to my dearest bed. every single day it has been this way. waking up late and enjoy my life spending time with mum over TVs. i dun like it this way. i swear. $$$$ in my pocket decreased and it's crying out loud once again.
had a big tiff with bf over $$$ yet again. he then decided not to meet frequently for 2months. he worked real hard. everyday and everynight.
i noe ive been the bad gf always. always demanding him to be with me. i jus need him. )):
but i didnt hold him back this time. i let him go and do whatever he aimed for. im only his gf not his wife. and he said was true. it also benefits me when he got his hard earn salary. oh my dear bf. he's a very humble person with lotsa kind thoughts.
i always wanted him to rest but jus cant resist him. i thank him for still taking good care of me right from the start.
i know i need to help him too. i will. insyallah.
for now, i just dunno and cant think of anything for our future. as far as i observed and concerned, we can only plan but Allah's the one to decide. one thing for sure, i wanna be near Allah as much as I could. we're not growing back as a little girl. we're growing up as an adult and there's always responsibility for us.
insyallah.
im looking forward for this year's countdown for 2011.
bringing my mum along to watch the fireworks together. insyallah.
matsah resigned from his current job and will start his new job next year.
i wish him all the best in life now and later. for he's the one i love and the one i thankful for. and i thank Allah for this wonderful gift.

big thank you to all my frens, cousins, family and everyone for sharing this year's moment with me. i dunno what's next in line for me.
thanks for everyone who has been there for me.
dear bestfren, wawa.
pestie, zira.
for all the laughters i need to complete me.
brother, matsah.
mum, samnah. my dad. stepmum and the rest of my family.
for the never ending love and support for me.
dearest boyfren, putera
for ur love, care, trust, faithful and sincere towards this relationship.
and to everyone out there who has been a part of 22years of life.

I LOVE U ALL ALWAYS. THANK YOU SO MUCH.

goodbye 2010. thanks for the unwanted and grateful moments.

May ALLAH bless all of us.

MUAXX!

2010-10-16T05:53:00.000-07:00

it's not as though i've been rude or treating u bad lately.

i dunno why you came to appoint wanting to be super obsessive. i dun wanna use the word super la okay. maybe ACT OBSESSIVE.

u already know that i'm not any type of person who love to play or waste my time without u around your back.
so u should jolly well keep ur trap up!

super irritating. i know u're trying to say that u have the right to tell me to be home early and stuff.
but dear baby, havent u know that ur dearest babygirl here wont listen?
because we DO NOT practise this kinda activity before. as in be back ASAP, report strength and blablabla.
i've give in to that report strength's part.

and it's bloody scary la yesterday when u suddenly made me wanna cry la with ur words!
BECAUSE i dun know what's wrong with you at the first place.
and BECAUSE i'm hanging out with the people you know! OH GOSH!
how can u simply be sucha.....

seriously. I'M NOT WORKING ANYMORE, I DUN HAVE ANY REAL RESPONSIBILTY THE NEXT DAY, WHEN I'M AT HOME I DUN EVEN SLEEP TILL MORNING and now u trying to say i cant hang out with them till late ANYMORE?

yeah read that! ANYMORE.

i used to lepak with them till LATE and you DO NOT say anything the other TIME!
why now?

and it's not as if i've been meeting them in a regular basis!

Ya Allah. kadang2 aku rase mcm tertpu pun ade. rase mcm tkde org paham aku ah.
sesungguhnye, dier ckp yg kite nie bukan 2 or 3 bulan kenal jadi aku kene paham dier. beh tk kan dier tk kenal aku????
bile mase nye yg aku nie buat jahat kat luar sampai dier kene buat mcm nie???
dan aku bukan selalu lepak dgn kawan2 aku! dier yg banyak lepak dgn kawan2 dier!
and aku pun kadang2 ikot lepak skali.
but i never complain.
aku bukan nk burok2 kan name dier. memang dier baik. terlalu baik dan slalu manje kan aku dlm hal2 gnie. tapi salah sape skg aku jadi gnie?
memang salah aku jugak pasal degil tk nk dengar kate. tapi aku nye org memang mcm gnie pe.
AKU TAK SALAH, JANGAN NK CARIK PASAL SUKE2!
sape suke orang buat mcm tu?
dan lagi2 dier BOYFREN aku. dier yg patot lagi paham dan kenal aku.

and whatever you may think, i dun do this once.
at least i'm not playing ur back. that's the most important thing u gotta know!
and one thing for sure, this is a total CRAP!

fight with me for something more challenging can?

i'm getting bored of this.

seriously am.

lastly, blame urself for being too good until u hurt someone's else feelings with your action.

THANK YOU.

2010-09-27T15:00:00.001-07:00

0559am, tuesday.

i cant sleep. )=
tried and failed.

baby's right beside me sleeping soundly eventhough he's perspiring at the same time.
poor thing. sorry la. next time i kipas kan u okay. (=

and while typing this down, i'm listening to the most romantic and sad song ever!
bila cinta by gio.
watched the movie too. kinda sweet and touching.

i would to say Alhamdulillah for today, yesterday and days to come.
for today, i've found matsah's i.c. yeah for me. and i've found solution for one of my never ending problems.
thanks Allah. thanks to bestie wawa too for all her kind words and never ending prayers for me too. she knows what best for me and she's been there for me like forever.
too many problems to settle and too little time to do it.

i didnt manage to occupy my time for work for the past 2 months. i really hope i will soon.
i love times like this when i jus hafta sit at home, sleep and waking up late.

boyfriend's working hard himself for the past months. i really saw the potential in him. potential for my future. insyallah.
yes, we struggled at times and then back on track but it won't be too long till it's back to struggling. but whatever it is, i really thank Allah for this precious gift i own.
he's the man i wanna grow old with.

yesterday was GENG BIO BERHARI RAYA DAY!
super fun i tell u. wish it didnt end that night. haha.
i really miss all of them. especially, ALL!
it was a great day and night throughout.
first house was to linda's then to siti's then to an's and then to mine.
after mine was to kak sue's then to budi's. after that to fadli's then to hafizul's then to noreen's. off to ati's auntie then to naz's and the last was baby's crib.
Alhamdulillah we managed to complete the 12hrs given timing. importantly, we managed to get everyone's back safely except for fadli.
he hafta to get home by bus after the last house.
sorry dear. but he agreed so well, fair enough. (=
thanks to all ex and current bio peeps. nad love u all to bits.
cant wait for another get-together session.

and before yesterday, saturday was out jalan raya-ing with baby's tko brothers.
it was a fun outing yet again.
photo taking sessions, the rain, the bikes, the car, the asap2 and i wont forget the accident occured.
poor zul and gf. they skidded and had minor injuries.
but they continued with the plan even when they're not feeling very well on that day.
elle, zul's gf was still in the shocking state after hours.
thank Allah they're safe.
hope baby love that saturday. hope he had fun too.

2days of raya-ing is also equals to 700plus photos in his canon.
and of course, good luck to me lor when uploading the pixies.
need to resize sumore. ))=

before i forget, i still wanna wish my dear boyfriend a HAPPY 24TH BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
so old already sey! haha. u better takecare of urelf okay. cos u need to takecare of me too. hee! whatever u wish for will come true. insyallah. and really hope u love what i presented for u. ily u baby soooo much! may Allah bless you always dear. (=

brought him to have some fun with the games and movies. mens stuffs. and i didnt get him those sweet cute2 cake. haha. brought him diff slices from starbucks. thanks to his brothers for making it happened too.
manly special cakes. ((=
and his belated bday's present, canon DSLR 500D.
i soo loving it.
I KNOW YOU LOVING IT TOO! hahahahaha.

alright, gonna try to close my eyes now.
cant wait for thurday to come.
it's MY BOYFRIEND'S OFFDAYYYY! YEAHHHHHHH!

morning to all! ((=

2010-09-21T23:50:00.000-07:00

so many things to say.

will be back tonight! ((=

2010-09-05T14:09:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY ONE AND ONLY OLD MAN, SULAIMI BIN MAHWAN! (:

yes Ayah, it's ur bday today. yet again, time went by so fast till i dun realise that u're actually at ur real old age.
well, that's life. everything's without realising. sometimes it isn't fair for us. i hate this part the most. myself to blame for not really taking in the small details lately or earlier on.
either way, i'm much observant now. much taking things seriously if it regards my family. i dunno why. it's just the feeling of wanting to do everything with ur family for now. i've tried and gonna keep on trying.

and of course, to my dear Ayah,
i'm wishing you the best of the best a daughter's wish for their father. u, my wonderful dad( i'm tearing up already.;( , i wanna thank you so much for being there for me without me realising all of it. financially, u're always there i should say. i dun wanna brag bout the things i cant have eventhough i noe i can have if i'm living with u. i dun used to go over u and ask for simply anything. mum dun teach me that way. with that, i'm totally and really appreciative of what u've done for me throughout my schooling days and right now for still giving me that sum of cash for my monthly pocket money. i really thank u for that dad.

just wanna let u noe that i've been missing you alot forever. and u'll be in my heart no matter what has happened between us.
i wanna bring you dad. i wanna do the same things to what i wanna do for mum.
i'm as the youngest of all, i hope for some miracles for me as i myself knew that we're getting older. i cant do much if anything were to happen before i could make u guys happy.

Ayah, today's ur big day! i hope u jolly well enjoy todayyy yaaa! hehe. u sure does! cos u're one happy and smiley man i've always see. i noe too many sorrows or pains u kept to urself. u actually have me and brothers if u anything to share about. we're always here for u. jus waiting for the time for u to open up dad. anyway, i'm almost like u. smiling away all the sorrows and not to forget, we played pretends too much dad. and i realised that's not the very good way of staying healthy from the inside. i really hope one day u would speak up and hopefully we can help u in any ways. insyallah.

Semoga Allah murahkan rezeki Ayah dan panjangkan umur Ayah. Semoga Ayah dilindungi nya dari segala bencana dan dugaan dalam dunia ini.

Ayah, do u that noe ur smile always cheer me up and ur laughters always brought pains to my tummy! and that's FUN!
Thank You Ayah for everything.

Just so you know, eventhough we're not living under the same roof,
your dearest daughter and sons's always thinking and missing you.
Afterall, you're our flesh and blood.
Without you, we wouldn't be here dad.

Once again,

SELAMAT ULANG TAHUN AYAH KU TERSAYANGGGGG!

your one and only daughter,
nirah

2010-08-24T13:35:00.000-07:00

everyday is a new day.
each day has it own story.
nothing in mind, messing my head.
i gotta love and erase those hates.
tell them i'm sorry for being me.
i can't see it well and clearly.

baby there's not much to say actually
i'm just being me lately.
for all the thoughts and tries i've made
another mistakes seems like forever to re-make.
i rather skip all those thoughts and move on with life
but it kept hunting me down and nothing i could do but just cry.
it wont't hurt to feel sorry for all u've done
but it really hurts to see those who wish you could so something fine.

i never know that life's hard like this.
i've always knew that i'm that strong girl people always seen
and that strong girl finally found the path to feel and speak.
nothing matters if u don't believe in yourself.
nothing matters if you trying to be yourself.
all that matters when you finally feel so alive.

good things always has the ending but it doesn't mean pain.
bad things can't never always be seen but in so much vain.
picturing my life and people's life is much of the same.
we've gone through tough times in the sun or rain.

love and destroy is two different things.
love is appreciation.
destroy is devastation.
i love myself and i don't wish to see it lost in the shadow of insanity.
i never appreciate destruction as i know i don't deserve it.

many faces has changed my life. many lives been part of me.
too many words to just describe how i feel. too many words sometimes, don't mean a thing.

i have dreams and dreams are made for all. dreams are what we're aiming for and that's when u know u're living your life in full of pure.
no point regretting they say. there's always a solution in every problems u face.
with a little prayer invades.

i don't hate my life. i love my family and friends. i love them all.
they are the one i look for whenever i'm in need. no matter what ever happens to me, they will still be there for me. i know my life. i know my friends.
the endlessly feeling of love between me and them can never be erased.
they do play a big part in my life.

& my boyfriend, he's the one i look for everyday and every night. i am feeling very secured while with him. he's the other half of me. he brings me joy and laughters and even tears.
chase away my pains and brushing away my sorrows.
he's the one i'm sharing my life with for tomorrow.

my random writes.
during the moon's bright.

i guess everything's gonna be alright.

2010-08-17T14:39:00.000-07:00

*aku lupe bile aku amik gamba nie. definitely not recently. i dun have DOUBLE CHIN back then! haha. found this in my photobucket!

tk mungkin kerana sayang. cuma kadangkala, aku terkenanggg~
that was the last video i watched on bf's hp.
haha. me singing that song laaa on my bday!
& bf was like laughing due to some parts of it, i was singing damn semangat! tunjuk perasaan aku marah la. ape tk! videoman tangan senget seyyy! haha.
poor thing la my bf. always kena marah from me. but he still calm and tenang like the sea. haiz. im jus super lucky to have u baby.
&& he kissed me on my forehead before going off to lalaland. ((:
see! how can i not sayang sayang him! TELL ME!

its 5:42am now. dunno whether sahur's over or not. haha.
but we had our tummy filled with lotsa food jus now before turning in. except me, im still surfing the net cos i promised him not to sleep so that i can wake him up for his reservist later on. oh yeah. his hair super short for now. no more sign of his highlights. WASTED! but it's okay. new tebyia. hehe.

so tomorrow, interview's at tanjong pagar at 5pm with matsah gemok. then off to idk where since he's the one who's gonna plan the outing after my interview. i just membontot je!
klua dgn matsah best! i dun hafta come out with single cent pun. he's always the one treating me. ((((((:

i dunno if i have the cash to treat mak for her this year's baju kurung. did asked matsah on this. but well, hafta jus wait and see.
every year since last 2 years, and since my stepdad wasnt around anymore, i brought my mum to geylang to let her choose her baju kurong and whatever other things she needs. i was happy after that of cos. at least la kan. i dunno la. i jus felt happy really happy whenever i did something for mum.
i dunno what the future holds for us but im sure, i will always be there for her no matter what. i have to accept that it's already written that my life gonna be this way. i cant do anything about it. i hafta face it.
i jus hope matsah have the heart for mum like i did. im not saying he's damn selfish la. it's jus that, he's not like me. he have difficulties to actually jus say yes to upon mum's requests. at times, mum hafta ask me to matsah for market's cash. haha.
i had fun and it's my pleasure to pressure matsah till he finally gave the cash to mum. LOL!
i have power i guess. but it dun work all the time!

lotsa stuffs lingering in my mind. lotsa stuffs to be done. i do hope everything's gonna be fine one day. people do have problems and at times, u cant get help from anyone except from urself. i felt that ive wasted my time sometimes. i dunno what else i need but there's still something that ive yet to accomplish.

im already 22years old. i need to do something bout this. i cant jus wait and see. i gotta do something bout it. I MEAN IT!
everything need CASH $$$$$$$$$$$. -.-
&& i need my own heart to be part of it too. no heart=no success.
-_________________-

dear classmate, lysa told me that we're having exams on 2nd sept. HAHA. *faint!
i have to study hard for this. this is my only hope. i flung my past exams. i already expected it to be that way. well now. i have to do my best for this coming one. if not, REPEAT LA KAU NAD THIS MODULE! ):
kite nk kene study same2 la gengs. LOL! yok! yok! yok! since the exams's during puase, we can buke then study together. CAN OR NOT! -___________-'
kesian kan lah kawan kau yg tua nie. otak da lembab. hee!

sugar dreams all. (=

another half an hour to wake him up.
then i can sleep peacefully.

DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~

2010-08-16T14:01:00.000-07:00

woot woot! slamat bersahur semue nyee!
i shall skip my sahur today due to the obsessive water inserted to my tummy! blame daddy for stopping every hr for drinks! LOL! only twice la but still, ice kacang and all. haiyo! and not forgetting the late night supper over at teh tarik with matsah too.
gatal! tk dpt ikot go geylang, ajak org go teh tarik teman dier makan! -.-

anyways, as mentioned, mama and ayah and baby qistina and me went to geylang yesterday.
didnt grab anything for myself but instead, bought a baju kurong for my dear bf. yesyes, i cant wait to get my baju kurong lor!! patience nad. patience.
i would rather buy mine when all the price goes down esp last day of puasa. (:
i will surely grab one by then. insyallah.
and by the way, it's always fun and my day's full of laughters when my dad's around. ade je la lawak dier tu. lagi2 he love to disturb my adorable niece! haha.
kecohhh! i laughed till i had sore throat! thanks DAD!

i cant wait to say this. yes i really cant. but i dun wanna get too excited over this. cos im scared. -___-
u see, im supposed to start work over at Rinto's today but unfortunately and in a good way, Nora texted me regarding a job vacan over at her place. i was damn happy of cos. but at the same time, KELIRUUU.
aku tknk Rinto pikir ape plak la kan. but he was green-lighting to it too. maybe he understands la what i really want and wanted for so long.
memang la aku tkde experience in spa, beauty or massage but im willing to learn!
i love hair. i wanna open my own hair salon okay! but! tu cite2 je! belum kenyataan. insyallah.
so maybe this a stepping stone for me to upgrade myself.
training will be provided for 2 months.
i jus hope i can do it. and wont stop.
haiz. close ones sure noe what i meant.
later going for the interview but still not sure la whether it's tomorrow or the day after.
gonna update more bout it soon!

and i shall end this post by saying GOOD LUCK to my babylove for his reservist's IPPT!
yes, GOLD not GOAL sayang. LOL!
im not even on my fb's page but i already noe. thanks to my iphone's notification on that! ((:

my glad to have both my pestie and boyfren doing great towards each other.

PEACE NO WAR BROOOOOOOOO!

XOXO!

2010-08-12T13:34:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to Me, Siti Nadhirah Bte Sulaimi.

I had the most wonderful birthday’s celebrations eversince im with my boy, Putera. He found ways to make me feeling all so excited when it comes to this kinda occasion. Its jus sometimes, the sincerity can be felt without forcing ourselves to see it. Yes, he my man, always succeed to make me a happy girl throughout the celebration. And of course, today’s my birthday. He did very well today.

1st surprise was to cash studio. Sing a long session just the two of us. I must say it’s not really a surprise afterall cos Putera came bursting everything out. I was the one who stopped him from letting me noe everything since the clock is barely 12am. Its still 11pm(11 AUGUST).
And yet he’s still insisted to let me noe the place for the 1st surprise. DUNNO WHAT’S UP WITH HIM! Haha. He’s double excited than I am I guess. LOL!

Anyways, 2nd surprise was the actual GIFT! It was yet again non other, a WATCH! Wat’s with the watches too sayang? It’s not like any other kinda watch I used to aim and used to have eyes on. The one from was way from wat I expected it to be. Few diamonds on the front and slightly golden plated with black leather crocodile skinned. ((:
Nice? Oh yeahhhh. The price even nicer! Putera kena nagged with me through the journey. i wasn’t happy with price. I WASN’T! yes W A S N T HAPPY! I was shocked to catch the price tag underneath the pretty watch. 355.50 after discount. WHAT? TELL ME WHAT???! I told him that I wont go buying all this expensive watch, wats more it’s jus a watch. I was non stop nagging and kept wondering and it dun stop there. Then I was pretty much convinced by Putera’s word. He told me this, no money can ever buy me or my love. To show his appreciation and how much his love for me, he presented me this watch. As a symbol of his love and my love together in it. I was truly shocked and started to fall in love with him all over again.
I must say that this lovely watch got to be handled with care and it’s too precious for me now. Another meaningful gift I got from him ever. Dats not all.

The 3rd surprise was over at Swensens Holland Village. The place where I celebrated my pestie’s bday along with syasha and nazri. I wasn’t of any sort noes the next location we’re heading to. He gave me clues. And I actually tot he’s bringing me to have breakfast over at Macdonalds. Haha. Macdonalds my foot! It was SWENSENS! Right after he made the U-turn along the Holland Village’s road, I was smiling from ear to ear. I was pretending not to noe the actual plan, still. He brought me in the restaurant. Since it was already 3am in the morning, there’s only a couple of girls muching away their food. We were seated behind their table! (:Boyfren ordered breaded chicken and I had sirloin steak with black pepper sauce. Not to forget, the redeo wings he ordered. I was craving for steaks since forever! I was actually hesitated to get that meal. it’s quite pricey, dats why. But boyfren said yes to everything I asked! Hehe.

We had the late night supper cum sahur for Putera with laughters and beautiful songs played on their stereo gave me goosebumps whenever I looked into his eyes. I had sucha wonderful time that night. I wasn’t feeling my best due to the lack of sleeps but I was enjoying myself to the fullest and dat matters the most.
While the food was almost done, boyfren settled the bill. We chatted again while waiting for the server to pack our leftover food. 2 redeo wings! HAHA. I was already full at that point of time. I ate my food very well unlike Putera. He left the yellow friessss! He claimed that he’s already full. With that, I dun see why he would wanna get himself a desert right? I was actually very sad when I dun see him ordering any dessert. I wanted the firehouse birthday’s ice-cream but didn’t have the guts to tell him. HAHA. It’s okay, my dear PUTERA made another surprise for me! I had a oreo ice-cream cakeeeee! It was served and we’re the only person left there. At least I dun hafta to cover my face. HAHA. Putera sang me a birthday song and I sang for myself too. We took tons of pictures jus for that special cake I ever had. Oh yeah, ice-cream cake! My 1st ever! I thought boyfren said he was already full right? He took 3 slices of cakes while I ate 2 slices. Haha. Ice-cream lover eh Putera? Hehe.

We took our own sweet time doing jus everything there. As for me, I took most of the time admiring my sweet sugar boyfren. He was jus being the old him I knew. The one that has full of surprises for me. Not to forget the moment of glory, when we both spoke bout wedding and stuffs. YES! I was feeling super awkward till I had to stop him again! He was very calm as ever. Sincere like forever. Getting hitched was not the 1st on top of my list but while talking bout it, I felt so happy. I’m jus following the flow. He was saying that he wanna settled down at the age of 28. So I would already be 26! And I was likeeeeeee. Then he changed it. 27 will be the age. And 25 shall be my most meaningful age. INSYALLAH.

Kita hanya mampu merancang, tuhan sahaja yang menentukan.

Boyfren wanted to get engaged first but not like a normal engagement’s agreement. Engaged for 2 months than get married. 2 months???? Haha. Baik tkyah tunang! But I still want TUNANG to happen! It’s a tradition wat. ((:
And so, on and on we went. Applying of house should be the first we gotta do. Im feeling all so excited and even happier as im celebrating my 22nd birthday at the same time!
After much smiling and laughing, we headed home. I brought my extra ice-cream cake home! Gave a slice to the person who served us. (:
I carried the box of dry ices and my ice-cream along our journey home.

I had a blast celebration with Mr. Putera Mohd Daud Ya Hakim Bin A. I wanna thank you again and again eventhough I know I have thank you enough. This, on my birthday, I would like to say to you, THANK YOU FOR ALWAYS LOVING ME and TOOK CARE OF ME VERY WELL from day one. I dun wanna lose this opportunity to say that I would always love you dear. I would always cater to you. Hopelessly devoted to you, Putera.
The surprises u came out with touches my heart and the moments kept flashing back in my head. I cant and wont forget this moments we had sayang. 2 years of my bdays was filled with joy, happiness and laughters. Last year and this one is EXTRAORDINARY’s ones. I thank you for that. U’re the special one I ever had. U’re the beautiful soul ever. Time may erase all this. But in my heart, ur touches, ur smile, ur laughs, ur tears, ur moments will always be with me forever.
Thanks for the "MY BABY YOU" 's song u sang for me. ;))

Once again, I THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING U’VE DONE FOR ME through the time we’re together. I LOVE YOU MY TEMOK TEBYIA. MUAXXXXXXX!

& to my dearest brother, Matsah. Thanks for the Iphone u presented me. Still sure a meaningful and precious gift to me. And wats not u’ve treated me, I thank you. I love so much Matsah. ((:

&& I thank all my peeps who wishes me. May Allah bless all of you. Thanks again for this memories. ((:
Xoxoxoxo,
Siti Nadhirah Bte S

2010-08-05T13:47:00.000-07:00

noe-ing that life's sucks living alone without family made me think twice to do shits to my mum. i love her alot, yes i do.
at times, we ourselves dun even noe what we're trying to prove to others and jolly well not being sure of what gonna happen next. but still, i dun think non of us would put a stop to it. nothing is impossible and all we can do is to just stay clear from any unwanted things to happen in our life.

pleasure is another word for all reasons we can think off. too bad we cant deny the fact that in this world, there's no one out there not doing any mistake through out their life. i, myself cant deny the fact that ive been doing bad things behind my mum. i dunno if she knows me that well. me doing this and that and all shits. there's always a moment where people for sure do the best that they could to hide this flaws. we dun wanna hurt them, thats another reason to it. i dunno how to explain it here. it's jus that somehow i felt, im not being the good daughter, sister, person towards my family. yes, be urself, thats wat people always say. but to tell the facts to ur precious person, i dun think one would have the courage to do so unless there's no other options to it.
we cant rewind everything back. if i could, i would want to turn into baby back. pure and innocent. all we can do now is to look into the future. and we still cant predict the future unless we're born to be extra special. BUT STILL, I AM NOT ONE OF THEM!

so many things happening into my life. and too much of it can make u sick. i encountered different cases altogether. i dun quite sure what im feeling about it right now. there's only one word. PITY.
i dun really quite sure whats the difference between my life and their life. with that, i came to a conclusion that im blessed to have a family like mine. im glad that i still have brain to think at times. yes, we can never exactly feel the way the other's feeling. but to think of it again, im really blessed. fullstop.
there's no need to do anymore searching bout this. I'M BLESSED!

i dun think anyone deserve to be punish in any way expect when they did something wrong. and when they knew that there's thing that they deserve to be punish for, i hope they jolly well accept it. dun go blaming on others esp ur own family for ur ruthless behaviours. dun punish them. PUNISH URSELF! dun go saying bad things as if they owe u a living! HELLO! they still support u eventhough ur old enough to feed urself. yes yes, i encountered this kinda shit! i have no right to judge anyone. i played a part to cool this shits down. but what they returned me? all kinda rubbishs that i dun have to know but i now i know, STUPID!

all i can say is that, im getting more and more closer to my mum. we dun do bonding session before. but im trying. i tried asking her out, trying to please her with anything. i talked to her randomly. and now, im letting her outta country again with her bestfren. i dun feel good tho. hopefully she return safely and go over peacefully. hope she would love the days in kampung. fruits season la they say. so ya, my prayers always with u, mum.

here's a piece for my daddy aimi too.
eversince we stay in a different places, i dunno how to feel u as my dad. cos i was still little at that point of time. but now im old enough to think and feel. i felt that u're the most wonderful gift God has given me. u both, my dearest parents. we may have the complicated family's story some may say but we still stay strong as one even without getting near to each other everyday. in our heart, we know it. in our heart, we're still as one. ALWAYS.
there's this one part touches me the most. over the weekend, me and my dad, my stepmum, stepsiblings with partners and even boyfriend joined in for the trip to K.L. the part when my dad held his hand full of rice, directed to my mouth. i was shocked and lost. yes, he fed me. not once, but for many times till i pretended that the food was spicy. i was about to cry for goodness sake! i looked at him and in my heart, it has been ages since he did that for me. thanks ayah. i love u more and more everytime u make me laugh. and every sec, im missing you. (,:

there's always a time when i felt useless and being used for family. but to think back, this is my destiny and ive to endure it and accept it. we cant run away from the facts but i sure will cry at times and thats okay. at least im doing it well. so well till i cried not becos of im sad but its the tears of joy and happiness.

u're the reason i learn to be independent and staying strong always. love you, ayah.

my dearest mum, u've always been there for us no matter whatever or whenever. u're our light thru our darkest days. thank you, mak. love you.

no matter whatever happens between us, we're still US. loving you forever, brothers.

Ya Allah, berikan lah Aku kekuatan untuk menempuh hidup ini dengan tenang. Berikan lah aku dorangan dan bimbing lah Aku ke jalan yang benar. Selamatkan lah kedua ibu bapa ku dan juga keluarga ku. Berikan lah mereka semangat untuk terus hidup, panjangkan umur dan murahkan rezeki. Amin.

2010-07-30T13:28:00.000-07:00

date: 31st July

2 more hours to go and we shall meet the rest.

heading to Kuala Lumpur today with loved ones.
excited of course. but hoping that this sleepless soul wont get cranky along the journey. *cross fingers*

waiting for babylove to reach here and last check for the stuffs and off we go.
he slept earlier on so i most probably he have to watch me sleep while in the bus later. ((:

i want this trip to be wonderful and nice.

im not sure if it's true la. mama said that we're gonna see DATO SITI NURHALIZA at the suite we dinning in later tonight. can percaye meh? we'll jus see. (:
erm. erm. erm.
hopefully i have the chance to snap pictures. i dunno whether im bringing any digi camera along with us. ade camera tapi tkde memory card! WTF!

anyway, would like to thank jiyah(the org kampong) for the company over to town. mcm org giler carik lens! i really cant live without it. -____-! cock eye betol la aku nie.
i had fun shopping with you. sorry for the MCM JAKON nk mampos browsing. been awhile i shop horrr. ade excuse horrr.
well, it's never enough for shopping. i still want more. but i cant. ):
Alhamdulillah i get to grab something for myself too.

enough said, i hafta shower now. putera's on the way here. dun want him to give me that MAD CRAZY look just becos i haven siap!
PAHALE TAU KALAU U BERSABAR DGN I! AMIN! AMIN!

goodbye singapore.

HELLO KUALA LUMPUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*i need a MASSAGE badly! i cant stretch good. I'M IN PAIN!*

BYE!

2010-07-29T16:40:00.000-07:00

Cloudy morning welcoming the rain
I am still here feeling in vain
As night went away, day comes by
Nothing in life comes in easy unless we try
The moment never end as I waste my time away
The moment is still here to stay
Regrets and past is not the coming present
I’m Always making the wrong decision

For the worse can hardly be seen
For the reasons they always keen
For the questions I answered for,
For the MAD decision I decided to soar.

My life’s a mess
With everything else.
My goals not achieving
This is more than torturing .
I still cant find me.

Good or bad,
Happy or even sad,
Useless or truly mad,
I’m way too upset.

More countless nights to go
More sleepless nights with you
Hopelessly devoted to you now
Kindly leave for a day or two.

My mind is full of YOUs.
I need to look forward not to turn,
Cause I’M looking straight into distance.

I pray for a better tomorrow.
Let this be good, not with any sweet sorrows ANYMORE.

my dangerous walks.

p.s: temok, temok, temok, kite rindu temok. see u tomorrow sugar! (:

2010-07-07T13:36:00.001-07:00

came late for work today.
mentang2 work at atrium not many eyes looking, i buat hal. haha.
tak sengaje wat! woke up late wat! ((:
and so, i extended my working hrs for saturday.
alah, kalau alek siang pun lum tentu ade confirm plan! HMMP!

anyways, i met up with pestie right after work jus now. off to boon lay for some k-ok session. not bad ah lu nye suare jiyah! haha. next time, can melalak lagikKkkk!
after k-ok, as usual, no plans. off for home.
oh yes, we watched twilight the other day. ((: i sooo loving the show la. haha.
confirm2 will download the first and second's movies!
jiyah la nie pandai2 ajar org ngok movie nie! kan aku da sangkot kan!
nice hanging out with u girl. just the two of us. been awhile kan tk kua 2 org jek. (:
hoping for more soon okay. insyallah.

SCHOOL'S BACK EVERYBODYYY!
i never sad2 already u noe cos i haveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee 2 frens already! haha.
both MINAHS. 1 minah2, another one minah tudung! ((:
glad to have them and nice talking to them too. meeting u guys every tuesday okay. (:
terima kasih Allah. ((:
ITE CCK was the BOMB! we had a short tour around the campus. not bad! very the top2 class2 one! *JEALOUSSSS!
afterwhich we studied Microsoft Excel in class. haven get myself confuse yet. so still okay. we'll see the next lesson okay.

i noe u're reading this too anytime soon.
i wanna apologise again for the mistake ive done. i noe i sudnt be uttering rubbish to u. i noe im to blame. im sorry sayang.
it wasnt easy for me to actually see the facts happened around us.
thanks for forgiving me and still have faith in me. thanks so much dear.
anger and frustration i faced.
sayang, i noe my words hurts u deep inside. i wish i could turn back the time. i wish i could eat back all the words i uttered. im sorry. really sorry.
maybe sorry means nothing to u. i noe.
it's the matter of heart and soul and mind. i hope that can feel me. feel my inner sense.
once again, i minta maaf.
)),:

it's sad sometimes to see ur partner got hurt by their own partner which is YOU. sometimes we did things without even thinking of other's feeling. honestly, i hate to be treated that way too. but i went overboard.
i fade away those smile my boyfriend always has on his face. i fade all his positive thoughts about me. i really am being rude and selfish. im outta control.
he's still calm as calm as he is always. he avoided more fights and he ended this fight with kind words.

dat's why i love this man of mine so blardy much. YOU cannot be replaced.
i love u too much darling. thanks again for this wonderful experiences uve presented to me. thanks for all ur care and concern and most of all, thanks for accepting the real me.
(,:

2010-07-03T09:20:00.000-07:00

maybe a short and sweet post will lighten up my night tonight. (:

i just got home from work but still have the energy to layan MR MATSAH. baik sungguh hati aku kann kann kannnn! naseb la kau banyak tolong aku, abang ku! kalau tkkkk. i dun care ahh!
itunes and all. done and now he's happily lying on his bed while browsing his stuffs in his iPhone!

2 weeks for noww, i'll be stationing at Great World City. ELC's atrium going on there. no sales or wat la. just singgah singgah. but well, the store really made good sale! today total's sale value: $4800plus. ((:
the more the better. so can get commission once more! im getting my first comission this end of month. tk banyak. but at least la org katekan.

pay's in but out already. settled stuffs. and yes, im broke. nothing new. it's okay. i'll try to pretend that i dun get any pay for the previous month's. sakit hati of cos. but patience is a virtue. i just got 50bucks from mum too. ((:
baik sungguh hati ibu ku. always noe wen im in need and all.
i love my mum and brother so much. cant live without them. i swear.

i got full shift for tomorrow. and so, i need more rest.

we went out for our off days. me and put met up with naz and jiyah for short while but we had fun tho. bought naz a cute lil belated surprise mochacinno. dun even noe how it taste like pun. but it was super cute and well, nice.
watched soccer with loves and of course, double madness.
bf was like cheering and stress-ing up while watching his FAV, GHANA play.
i was pressurize too. haha.
i wish we could spend more time together. meet up soon babies.
((:

sebelum lupe, just to leave a small note here too. i got iPhone from Matsah. how can i not say Thanks to him right?
well, i already did. haiz. i dunno how to repay all his kindness and sacrifices he made for us, family. May Allah bless his life. Happy2 selalu dan murahkan rezeki. Amin.

Last but not least, i also love my Tebyia. i dunno how not to love him even wen things got outta control. i dunno how not to adore him even wen he did stupid things. i jus dunno. please dun let me know how to hate u sayang.
i love u so much. thanks for bringing me out every off days and everytime i need u.
i love u oh sooo much putera.

there's this one msg that kept me wondering and laughed when i read it again. it's by him.
:

"Pebyia.. Bila I tgk mata u.. Hati rasa macm nk race gtu.. Sampai boleh buat I jadi giler.. Mcm nk ckp ello pebyia bnyk kali.. Hmm.. I miz u so much sayang.. Tak sabar nk jumpe nanti. Hehehe.."

yes, it was the sweetest ever text i got from him.

and so u know sayang, i love u more than u do. i miss u every sec of the day too.
i wish i could be by ur side always and forever. ):
selamat berkerje sayang. please takecare.

Putera Mohd Daud, gua cinta sama lu laaa DAUUUDDDDD! ;D

2010-06-24T11:01:00.000-07:00

waka waka! it's time for AFRICA!
world cup fever rightttt. even bf also having a 'slight' fever the other day.
he even wanted to get BRASIL's jerseys for me and for himself. LIKE DUHHH!
BIGGEST FAN AND ORANG BRAZIL PAT SINI TK BANYAK BUNYI, DIER LAK YG MCM2 KARENA!
musim la katekan. -_____-!

right now, i'm busy downloading latest songs and some old ones to be uploaded in my bro's ipod classic. all because of the long journey to and fro from my place to WORK!

i dunno how many times already i've said this. but ya, i'm offically ELC's staff at Novena, United Square. Never heard of EARLY LEARNING CENTRE? no worries. i don't know them before too. HAHA.
well oh well, now i do. still getting the hang of it. i tried and AM trying. i made efforts.
imma talk more bout my new work pretty soon. thinking of that place can only bring alarm to my legs.
kinda fire alarm siren! my legs's ACHINGG YO!

someone requested me to type something in here. first time request sey from PUTERA MOHD DAUD! actually, i have the intention too to blog yesterday night after 2 weeks of not seeing this laptop of mine. kesian.
at times, u wont even have the FEEL to waste any time when u're in the WORKING MODE.
what's more when ur workplace is damn far la. by the time u reached home(for afternoon shift), it's already going to midnight. poor thing kan!

thank Allah, sayangku putera fetched me from work last few days. Alhamdulillah he's back to work yesterday with his silly greeny putty. i so love the new bright green colour on his bike.
we lost 'blackberry aka District 9' few months ago.
RIP baby.
let's welcome silly greeny putty! reborn like that la KONON! hehehe.
i just love the feeling when bf fetched me or meet me or be with me or anything la with him.
dunno la. somehow IRRITATING and got IRRITATED by him for SOOO MANYY TIMES! i still endured and layan him. chey chey chey! GOOD GF OR WATT!! ((:

HE SO THE BACINNNN!!!!!!

seriously, i dunno what else to update already yayang. i wanna talk bout my new workplace but very boringgg~ la. soo ya, nothing else.

just wanna tell u this.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I MISS YOU!

& Peng Li did asked me just now at work how we got to know each other before becoming as one, i smiled and laughed non stop okay!

cause why?

we had the most UN-SANGKARABLE/ UN-EXPECTED meet up between us. and hell yeah, u're the PEMALU-ness person i ever met! u're the SELENGER BACIN(LOL!) but handsome handsome!
u're now my prince. u're my laughing gas. u're my hero. u're my brother. u're my darling. u're THE 'MONITOR'(haha). and the MONSTER. u're my SEXY man!
and moreeeee okay.

sayaaaaannnnggg kamu la! MUAXXX!

&& basically, i have nothing else in mind except YOU! so i shall end this entry by saying, WA AI NI BABY-BABI! ((:

2010-06-02T09:20:00.000-07:00

a day without ur voice.
a day of not replying to ur texts.
a day of silence.
a day from facing the fact that u were not sorry for what u've done.

NOT A SINGLE SORRY.

maybe i'm the one asking too much from u. especially this 'SORRY' word.
that's all i'm expecting since it's a way to apologise when u've done wrong.
hell no baby. hell no.

i appreciated the fact that u've been calling me, texting me and without fail repeating the same question thru text. but i didnt answer. i didnt even reply.
i used to reply eventhough we fought. a long widen texts of cause.
and do u noe why i didnt for now?

two words: EXTREMELY LAZY.

why? why must i? why SHOULD i?
afterall, all u did was to erase all the meaningful texts from me and forgets every single thing i said.
i've done this alot of time my dear. ALOT.
cause that's how i show or throw my anger at u when we fought.
i wont bothered to pick up ur calls cause i noe we would turned into arguments after seconds of decent chat.
so i skipped all ur calls, all ur texts, everything for today.
i just cant find the right reason to do it all over again.
but in the ended, i still suffer.

yes, u may think im being abit over reacted here or whatever u may think off or say.
it wasnt ur 1st time doing this. 2ndly, what wrong i did to always deserve this?
3rdly, cant u just DONT HIDE ANYTHING FROM ME?
WHY? WHY? WHY?
i wish u could feel what i feel now towards u.
i wish u could drown urself into the water, dats how hard im coping now.
and it really hurts baby. really. badly. truly. worse ever.

i didnt expect u to do this again and again and again.
this is seriously a small matter which i dun think I SHOULD DRAG THIS.
i wanna find ways how to make u realised how stupid it is to be doing shits like this. it's not worth it. it's not to any beneficial means.
or if there's, FOR URSELF I GUESS.
another word for u now.
SELFISH.

sayang, for whatever sake it is, i understand and truly UNDERSTOOD the situation we're facing now. to me, we're together on a same boat. we suffer together. we happy also together. but we dun betray or lie to one another. and especially something like what u did! FOR WHAT SAKE IS THAT?!
hello darling! u already noe me real well. i noe and can find ways to survive and putting efforts for US! SEE THAT! US! US! US!
not for myself. not for SITI NADHIRAH. for PUTERA MOHD DAUD YA HAKIM too.
yes. TOGETHER!
never did i once put u aside. never did i once neglected u.
so shall i say U ALWAYS NEGLECTS ME?
oh crap. this is total CRAP!

i dun blog jus for the sake of blogging okay.
anger. sad. pain. cry. confused. sorry. pity. worthless.
ALL IN ONE RIGHT NOW!

i never fail to tell u not to do such things to me for so MANY times.
u hide things. u lied to me. u tell me u're sorry but actually u're not.
u said u did this not on purposes. and what should i reply to that eh??
or like this.. "OH TAKPE SAYANG, I SUKE. I HAPPY. SOK BUAT LAGI LA. I HAPPPYYY LA!"
isit?

i failed many relationships. many hearts failed me. i lost many.
i cried too much. i apologised so much. i defended alot.

it's easy to say all this here but isnt easy to speak to u and whatsmore to gather all the sentences to send text to u. i tried many ways already.
i dun deny that we're actually very open and can speak to each other regarding our probs(life/blabalabla).
and this is ONE of the thing i dun understand why u cant open up to me.

im feeling really sad. but still smile as always.
im praying for the best.

We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy.

Let this be my last word, that I trust in your LOVE.

2010-06-01T10:06:00.000-07:00

“All charming people, I fancy, are spoiled. It is the secret of their attraction.”

I'm truly dissapointed with you.

2010-05-28T13:59:00.000-07:00

suddenly, i feel the urge to blog something out.
haha.
nothing better to do already.
fb checked. youtubing done.
sweeping away bf's hair from his forehead also done.
(:

earlier on, we dated naz and ati again for the second time but this time round,
mr aliman came along too. it was thier plan actually but they got us involved.
nothing new.
we went to catch prince of persia. that was an awesome movie okay.
prince dustannnnn. OMG! and his other brother. i told bf too that they're very charming. ((:
my plan is to sleep in the cinema while they watch that movie.
haha. terlalu kusyok watch the movie till mate pun lambat nk blink tauu.
bf did caught me there. babi u!
it was quite a long story tho.

marina barrage was the next destination.
we had kfc feast for a start. except me. i had mine after all of them are done with thiers. i had kfc YESTERDAY. so that simply explains why i had mine slow.
the weather was fine. with lightnings and thunders. Haha.
many others flied kites there. but with no common sense!
aliman was talking bout this history gotta do with some keys and electric.
something like that la.
then he alarmed us that we're in a dangerous zone and that we really have to shift elsewhere.
sumpah, aku takot eh.
bf was like syiok-ing eating the chicken while i on the other hand like one sick chicken!
and the brainless kite flyers, continued flying it eventhough the sky is so damn grey and the lightning came striking in per min rate.

*fcuk. gotta pause awhile to check on our lost hamsters! i heard noises. and i hate my brother for being a lazy bum to even see it! i swear i heard them.

and so, me and the rest went over to the water's features and had another great time there.
the lovebirds(not us) had their drinks. me and darling had fun dribbling the small ball we got from the kfc. (:
i OLE OLE-d him many timessss. i think i found another passion ah. passion for BALL-s. Haha.
i sweat real bad and my face, haha.
did some chit chat with dear aliman. he's been having this hardtomove on symptoms.
he failed his engagement and now still stuck on it.
i never encountered like this before but the truth is, still not easy to just let it go. with all the sacrifices he made for his ex fiance. all the hardships they had.
he's not looking forward for a fast replacement tho but all he wanted is to lead life as per normal and achieve his goals AND SAVE UP MONEY! he repeated it alot of times. -______________-
at least he still okay, belum lagi giler. hee.
if he needed anything, he knows who to find. we'll always be here man.

the actual damn reason i log in here is to actually said something bout me love.
*blush*
before meeting the rest over at marina square, of cos i've to meet my prince first at jurong east mrt station.
and the truth is, it was a damn awkward moment for us. it's not bout the public transport thingy. it's how we communicate and looked as if that was our FIRST meet.
GOD!
Putera was like smiling from ear to ear when he saw me. and i, haha. non stop covering my mouth. laughing and cracked random says. OMG!
it's been sometime to feel this kinda feeling.
Putera did felt the weirdness in us too.
oh well, we had some tiffs going on between us for quite sometime.
usually, it will be over the phone kinda arguments and ended up silences for the rest of the day.
to add to that, we also hasnt see each other for 4days like that. haha.
rindu semacam like that.
i just love the way he coax me. the way he ended the fights, always made me teared up and wants him more.
i may be the rude one always and i may be the demanding one too. he always gave in.
nice ways to make me laugh and smile again.

Baby, no matter how hard i try to hate you, i love you more than i always do. Baby, we may be in a difficult situation right now. Please hold my hands and lead me the right way like you always did eventhough without me realising.
Nothing really matters.
Thanks for being a part of me love. It's been my pleasure caring, loving, missing, kissing(haha), hugging, all the -INGS for you.
Oi, i so cant wait to go a little higher with you. You know i know baby.
Insyallah.

Happy Vesak Day people.
and imma ditch cousin, Sarini's engagement later.
with reasons of cos. (:

ilovemyprinceofsingapore/bukitpanjang all the time. (:

2010-05-27T15:05:00.000-07:00

my dear boyfriend threatened me before he went to sleep. he threatened that if i continue sleeping late than usual, he would keep this laptop over to his place. buruk siku or what?

haha. as he would already know, i wont agree to what he said and would always love to settle with fews reasons on why this laptop shoudnt be in his possession. so how now baby?

i always wanted to blog. at the same time, i always wanted to stop the idea to blog the whole lot of shits that now have been part of my life recently.
for the sake of my bf and fans(LOL!), it's my pleasure to rewind back the moment of truths. (:

it's not for laugh or something okay. this is god damn REAL.

Bali trip of ours wasnt that bad afterall. we cant seemed to find any best places to chill nor to bar. we had the most comfortable and annoying place to have fun. before i continue this xcitement of ours, i shall tap bf's back for the xcitement he had first. his was the most exciting part of this story ever. -_____-!

he caught up with an accident when he was on his way back from school. and which he supposed to get Rupiahs from my aunt that night. urs truly was truly mad at him for making lame jokes such as, "tomorrow, we cant go Bali." and worst, he said sorry whille he at the other side feeling the pain. i didnt believe a single word he said not until bf asked this one uncle to speak the truth to me. i was FCKING SHOCKED. i cried. i screamed. i panicked. i walked all over the corners of my house.

Bf's feet was badly injured. MOTORISTS PLEASE WEAR SHOES! the cuts to his feet was VERY DEEP. and what's more the doctors in NUH cant be bothered kinda doctors i guessed. i know it's not GOOD to assume or to say BAD things to the 'NICE' people! but i think whatever it is, they should do something to his feet not to wait until the 2nd day of his stay there. they said there's other important case to settle. oh wells, they took charged of it but WE PAID THE CHARGES TOO also what. should have gone to SGH. people said that it's alot better down there. Bf would have gone back home earlier than he did while in NUH.

what matters most is that he's safe and sound now shaking his other feet at home.
and of course we didnt get the chance to shake legs on a plane to Bali. the flight went off without us. the funny part was, i managed to cancel our hotel's booking but not our expensive flight's ticket. The whole Airasia's staffs fly to Bali too i guess cos they didnt answer my numerous calls! so both flight's ticket burnt to ashes.

I didnt win much hopes after the incident but bf did. Bf did have hell of his bad time looking at nurses doing their work and even had the chance to laugh with them. Me? Ohh. Just had to sacrifice my beauty sleeps and cracked a piece of my bone to visit him every single day. No, im not complaining tho. Just hinting the differences only! Haha. Bf had his one fav nurse on his mind ever since. BABI!

After he was discharged, i was in charge of him at his crib. Cooked meals for him. Laughed with him. Tortured him. Living under one roof with him is like hell on earth! We did fought and more fights every single day. Never did i expected it to be in that kinda way. I pitied him most. Matters which cant be expose to all. He was strong enough to undergo this kinda situation. Sorry dear if i did things beyond ur abilities. I did things for every right reasons to it.

After a week resting at home, he was able to move about to even go to school at night. He walked himself without using the waste-of-money crutches. He used it for awhile only then he ditched it aside. Very ego! Haha.

Alhamdulillah. He can even walked with me to catch movies, wasting cash on arcade's games, partying at Zouk and joined in my frens for late night chillax. Wherever i wanted to go, he brought me there. I wasnt saying that im not feeling any guilt for this. I did felt guilty at times. Happy too at the same time. I just cant go without him. FULLSTOP.

Oh ya, me and Putera would like to say Thanks to all who came down to visit him in the hospital. Especially my mum and dad came even twice to visit him over at his crib too. Much appreciated. I cant believe that my lazy fat brother would accompany me throughout bf's admission's process. I truly thank him for that. To my frens who barely knows Putera too and some got lost on the way to the hospital, much thanks. ((:
Everything happened for a reason and let the reason be good.

Enough said bout him and our canceled trip.

Let's talk bout me and my sucky life now.
Im free 24/7 except Tuesday's night. why? cos im jobless for NOW! hell yeah, im CASHLESS too. -___________________________-

i dunno why this is happening to me.
i cant say that i regret leaving premas eventhough at times i felt that way. i have reasons to why i didnt stay on the recent job i had.

dental assistant. it wasnt a bad job right? it wasnt also the best job everyone would love to have. correct? ive went through it all. ive tried it all. i did practically all.
but none of the above made me feel the good sense to stay on. i love it if u were to ask me. but in my heart, deep down inside, there's always this small voices. small voices making me think twice and making me think hard. i cant do this.
i cannot imagine dragging myself every single day eventhough the workplace is damn near to my house. i so cant do this.

i e-mailed my doctor the other day. she was yet again very supportive and patient to give answers to my needs. she even gave me the chance to settle my own things first and when i think im ready to work, i shall have to call her. how can i not been thinking about her off late. one thing, i dun even know how to tell her that i really wanna quit.

i went to interview for retail and another one soon.
honestly, it's been hard for me to cope financially. not easy for me to sit down and relax cos i got someone at home depending on me. i dun learn to owe a stable life. i dun learn how to burden my mum. i dun learn to have money for my own. so i totally disliked all of the above.
i need a job fast.

and as soon as i heard that my granny soon undergoing an op, i stumbled. we, the cousins, fund raising among us to settle least of the bill. Total of 10k plus. Nenek have to change the already in her(battery), to a brand new one. Oh dear. The amount cousin bro mentioned was 500 per person to fork out. U tell me now where am i suppose to get those moolahs from?
Rob from a begger i supposed. ):

So I blardy hope that imma get a job before June comes. The operation will be on JULY. A month for me to at least bury myself in any holes. -__________-

All the shits has been told.
Can I now have clean shits to hold?

Dear bf have been so supportive through my jobless's days but at times,he can be the JAHAT of all! i hate it. i hate it. i hate it.
please be gentle with ur words my dear. like u always say to me right from the start we met, "orang lain pun ada masalah tau."
SO YAAAAAAAAAAAAA! all back to you yang.

Im sorry to bother u so much and been a burden to you too. I never would have gone this far without u. and eventhough ur words might hurt me MANY times, i still think u're the one i need for most. i dun need anyone else.
i love you baby. get well soon. i need a ride on blackberry soon too. imy blackberry. ):

Life, pls be good to me and Putera, thank you. (:

2010-04-19T17:05:00.000-07:00

oh baby baby baby.

T W O more dayyysssss!
eh! sape tk excited giler!
i have to blog this down so i can somehow remind myself that i'm with a generous, loving, sweet, precious BF ever!
why?
cos he's the first to bring me outta this country for holidayy!!
insyallah.
cannot excited sangat pun!
but cannot help it laaaaa!
haha.

ermmm.
doing alot of searching here and there regarding that place we gonna settle our butts down for PLEASUREEE soon!
ya, googling too much of it.
and im happy of cos.
i already noe wat to do there.

eh walauwei!
im SOOOOOOOO FCKKIINNNGGGGG EXCITEDDD AND NERVOUS too lor!
the last one that i took the plane was with my parents and siblings.(with arwahnye)
maseh kecik and cute. dudok sebelah mat salleh cute mane tah then got really scared and never touch anything in the airplane! boleh gtuk?
celake nye mat salleh! buat duit mak bapak aku jeee! HAHA.
and now, no more mat salleh i hope.
it will only be U AND ME, sayang!
u excited tk???? HEHEHEHEHEHEHE.

currently im obviously lack of sleepsss for dayss and im uttering rubbish here.
it isnt any sorta rubbish to think of it again!

IT'S GONNA BE A MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR CHANGE OF MY ALREADY-HAVING-THE HAPPINESS's part of my LIFE!
DOUBLE HAPPINESSSSSS TO BE EXACT!

okay, i siao ting tong now.
seriously like retarded.

off to bed now while the rest of the working adult dragging themselves to their workplace. god bless them. that includes my boyfriend la k.
part holiday je, sweetttt! hee.
watever. dier je yg kenal aku dan tau care aku dan tau perangai aku dan tak akan melupakan ku dan akan menikahi KU!
did i just typed that?? LOL!
berangan nad berangan~

im out now.
be back for more to be shared!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

*can i even blog when im over at the other side?
-______-'

2010-04-16T19:12:00.000-07:00

since i could barely sleep, i suggested myself to type this balblabla down.
see. i dont even know what to do.
all i did before this was to keep changing my fb's status, bloghopped, google down stuffs and texting the bf.
im waiting for mum too. called her since i saw that she's not in her room or nowhere to be found in the house, i requested for breads and a dozen of eggs.
im gonna get my hands to do something for my crave!
tambahan lagi dgn perut ku yg lame since midnite!

blame myself for not getting my hands on the siput sedot!
i checked the kitchen and it's gone. )):
stooopidddd topid topid!
it's okay. as long as bf got his share. (:

me and mum going over to granny's later in noon. 3pm! and now it's alrady 1019am! i've yet to shut my eyes! this eyes are made for fb-ing and whatsnot eh?
ishk! mcm irritating gtuk kan when u noe u're already tired and sleepy but u cant seems to leave the world for a moment.
argh! im fcking angry!
and sad. cos im feeling the tiredness already. but i cant sleep! or else!~ tk bangon aku raseee! haiyooo!

already missing the bf. i dunno why. but jus rindu him. we didnt meet everyday now.
i miss working. cos that's when he'll be fetching me every single day!
i think this way is better somehow.
giving each other some time of our own and spaces to breathe.
need mehhhh?

oh ya, the luggage is already getting itself ready to be brought out by resting in the hallway. haha. so semangat to ask mum to find it!
i did occupied it with my clothes. i have to rearrage it back or throw some out. too many i guess. i just dunno what to bring along. bantal busuk can bring also?
i feeling so retard for not preparing earlier.
now im left with 5 more days to crack my head and get going!
excited plus very very stress.
whatever.
i'll be on vacation soon!!! *kening naik-naik giler babi!
note to self: dun malas malas nad! better get all done quickly then can think freely! (:

i'll have to ask mum to wake me up later cos i was whispered by nad's eyes that it's gonnaaaaaaaaaa....

2010-04-13T07:19:00.000-07:00

I'm currently at Putera's crib.

Earlier in the afternoon we went over to the Malaysia Embassy to collect put's birthcert and renunciation of Malaysia citizenship. and we saw lotsa of 'his' frens. Not exactly frens but country's frens. LOL!!!! how could I not remember that he's one of them! Hee! He was born there. If I could recall back, he was born at Hospital Sultanah Aminah. Cool shit la his birth cErt. Unlike ours. mcm sekeping paper but up Sket la K. Laminated sumore. Hee.

It was scorching HOT la the weather. The bahang-ness!

After he settled his case, we went to search place to cool down our bodies. LOL!!!!
We ended up at borders then to shaw tower then to far east plaza! we failed to satisfy my needs. I needed long john's silver! I actually knew that the restaurant were no longer there in far east plaza level one! despite that thought, we still made our way there. Haha.
Yes of course we didn't manage to queue for ljs! Some chinese restaurant took over their spot.
Poor me!! ):

I decided to have our late lunch at his favourite 'used' to be food store. Dahlia's cafe, the name.
I had Nasi goreng kampung while my bf had his mee hongkong! his meal was abit turned off! So pale like that the mee, udang, sotong and a single piece of sawi! dat was the funniest one I ever Saw!
I did not finish up my Nasi all by myself. With the help of bf, the Nasi plus chilli padi managed to be part of his delicacy. It wasn't a forcing game okay! Nasi, why nowadays u not in my list? Can't simply to look at it and swallow it! I need some fried food! I'm becoming the old me, Baby!!!! -____-'

off to where his bike was parked after the lunch. it was drizzling as we walked towards borders. we, the slengeh couple, walked extremely slow while focusing on the other side of the sky. Obviously it was pouring hard over there. And we should run for our precious clothes to get wet instead of walking slowly and admiring the other sky at the same time! What a gong!! We laughed and found shelter near borders.

We waited for more than an hour before we could road down to my new school. Haha. ITE clementi was my semi final destination. put managed to send me there 10 mins after my class started. We caught in the rain,of course. ):
Reaching upon the entrance of the school, I was too nervous till I almost took off my helmet before bf could drop me at the pick Up point. Wth! Lucky bf never see! Malu~
Bf made his way to his old school! ITE Dover. He started school too that evening! He's late too cos of me!! He told me that he's the second Last to be there. LOL!!!! And he class consist of 6 students je!! Good sey! My class have a lot u noe! And one of them the name I can remembered was Mary's. She asked George(my lecturer) too many questions. Haha. lucky she sat in the first row. Kesian George if she was sitted at the back. Exercise abessss! LOL!!!!

For me, I did 4 assignments just now. Text spacing, line spacing, paragraph indecent and bullet. All in microsoft word 2007. I like ms word 2007! Very easy! we did typing of course then adjust to whatever the given instructions. I did asked George my few tk perlu questions. LOL.
Like, how to find violet? But actually it means PURPLE! Fcuk the instruction! Made me blind in some ways or another!
Overall, I love being there eventhough I haven't start any conversation with the classmates. Some already started laughing sey! Yela, they sat next to each other! While I, sat beside tembok! Ermmm.
let's talk aite? Our next class, shall we?? Nad mcm Paham. ZzzZzzzz.
class ended and darling baby fetched me and and now I'm at his crib!

small talks with his mum. She prasan that I've chopped off my head,NOT! Hair. She said I looked fresh. I joked like this, Why???? Funny Isit?. she replied the above. Hee. I like so Jahat sey like that. No la.. I wanna show her my true colours. Not the setan side la of cos! The funny merepek can bebual part of me!!
Eventhough it's a short and sweet convey, I loving it.. She's cute and she's smelling good! Minyak wangi tu wahai mak nye putera?? can share? (:

Now waiting for put's bro, Ali to return blackberry to us. We heading JB later on and gonna stuff my mouth with junk food! More and more of it pls!
Sipping the remaining cup of water then I'm off to watch csi mode.

Till then people.

I love my Temok baby ia so much!

Bali oh Bali..

U're up next!
(((:

2010-04-11T11:51:00.000-07:00

long fat post.

monday.

i had this break down jus now towards the beginning of today. right after bf send me home, i changed and got ready for bed. but while doing so, i sat upon my bed and idle for moments. i texted wawa and bf. i cried during texting and the tears kept rolling down.
i knew i would be doing this sooner or later. some people just have to keep everything, i really mean everything to themselves and at times, u cant depend on anyone. all u need to do is, just burst it out either by talking to someone or like me; crying myself out in total darkness with my fat brother who's snoring away on his bed beside me.

i felt hopeless. i felt unsecured. i felt sadness. i felt everything. jus everything.
and with my love one, putera, treating me oh so not very nice nowadays. made it just worse!

i poured my tots,feelings and how sad i can be while doing that(texting) to wawa and the evil bf currently. i had frens. close frens. besties and a pestie too. but i dunno why i cant seems to fill them up with my sorrows and whatsnot. i rather speak good words with them or jus simple jokes which somehow made pestie's tummy cramped! lol.
i love making others happy. i already noe that their minds are already polluted with whatsnot too so i shall not pollute more of it to their mind and soul. dangerous.

true enuf, i had the unbearable moment of my life jus today. like bf said, we cannot turn back the time. we cannot keep wanting things to be the same we used to have decade ago.
i dunno why but i kept wanting more attentions to be given to me. put bf aside. he's been giving me lotsa everythings i need in my life since we first met. maybe or jus maybe i really need that most priceless comforts from both parents.

i already know that they trully care for me eventhough they didnt have the courage to show. i need it to be real. if ever they do so, i'll be the happiest person on earth for all my life.
sadly, they never did. we're very in good terms with each other. my dad still calls me up or text me to know where my whereabouts. we're not living under the same roof but he still care right by doing such-and-such?
but as an adult, i need jus more than that. i know we cant expect much frm our sweet parents. am i asking too much tho?
i dun deserve this. no one in this world deserves to be treated this way.

and my life. i've becoming to think little for my future. i had lotsa goals in life. everyone does. as far i can see, i've been trying hard to adapt to my new workplace and trying hard to do better each and everyday. i tried. i triedddddd. but i failed. i failed to boost up my confidence for this work. i failed to realise that i'm lucky to possess a job. i failed to pluck the courage to speak to the 'inner ME'. i failed alot of things right after i made that unwise decision.
regrets. regrets and more regrets after this.

silence doesnt do good for long time. it had to be heard or seen. i would rather keep silence to myself but the remarks will only turn bad not to urself but to others too. esp to MUM. i wont be able to do her proud by keeping silence. people have to hear me do this. people have to see me care for mum, people have to see us going thru this beautifully. brothers and me gonna be the very person she needs in her entire life. we struggled to see her smile. we did this all for her, jus her. i wont be doing this for some may say, shopping spree or some may say, work hard, shop hard. im happy for those who made that as their statement for having a job. the feeling of discontent at another's good fortune or success: ENVY.
oh yes, im sure i did envied alot of people out there. by their looks, moolahs, bikes, houses and even their parents. who wouldnt right when u came from this kinda family potrait. this envy feeling is always there but i dun deny that i had family too. MUM never fail to cook so damn good foods for us. clearing our bundle of laundry daily. smile for us eventhough she's not having the best for her life yet. random talks among us made due to her cute moves. took in the blames for whatsnot that happened in our lives.
so to me, envy-ing others is the another way to tell them that they're lucky and dont stop appreciating the priceless gifts from God. i appreciated all of the above mentioned as much as i could. some may not have the chance to even think of it.

and so i should say, i need to be more focus now or never cos i've been booked this tues/wed by ite clementi. for wat u say? schooooooooooolll laaaaaaa! geez!
im starting school which i dont realised that the time has come for me to make use of my fingers to write and my brains to absorb and learn in another new environment. -_______-'
and i almost fainted thinking bout it. where the hell am i supposed to go find the classroom?
much thanks to bf when he decided to not meeting me tomorrow till sunday.
i need you to tell me what to do on my first day of sch! i wish i could faint right after he made that decision! so at least he can come to the rescue and i'll be back in his arms againnn! ^___^&*&&#*&$&@**!!!
he super jahat right to do this at the very last min and when we starting our 'night sch days'!
dont like that la putera. dont action.
im very anxious! nervous. excited. imagination rabak giler. scared. shy. GOSHHHH!
why in the first place i apply for school?!!
okay. i have to do this and can do this.
can go to school only then no need work?? *shoot my head then it recovered back

feeling the lose now. Alhamdulillah.
way to go blogger. u chilled me up when i was down. all thanks to Siti Nadhirah, myself.
i learn not to keep things for too long. even if it's a small matter to you, get it solve as quick as earthquake.
so right after i cried, i texted, i wiped my tears, cried again, wiped my ingus(lol), texted a very long one to both bestie and bf, i cool myself down by fb-ing and blogging.
i found some weird shits.
in no time, I TOOK THE EFFORT TO KEEP AWAY THE THINGS INSIDE ME FOR LONG SO I TEXT BF AGAIN for an itsy bitsy matter. LOFL!
take that! i wont keep things within me again! better be careful with ur moves bf! anything i see i hate, i tell. then u decide wat to do next okayyyy.

almost 5am now and i cant sleep. thanks to my long power afternoon naps! sempat catch REC2 movie with bf tadi 930pm @ Jurong point. ((: so-so la the crite. yg penting, aku dpt spend time with bf aku sudah la! O=)

the weather is so hot, i can feel myself burning.
visiting the polyclinic tomorrow cos i'm having this symptom. dunno what actual disease la. will find out tomorrow. soo panas! soo rimass! luckily i chopped off my hair already!

slamat pagi semua. im dearah. tadi membebel pat atas tu NADHIRAH. hee.
thank you baby. thank you bestie.

love me for me and i'll love you more for just loving me!

life's so unpredictable. at times you think u have the world for you. but actual fact, you dont. u still have yet to find the true meaning of life till you had ur last breath.

2010-03-31T07:57:00.000-07:00

it's already Wednesday baby.
fuhh. and Friday, GOOD FRIDAYYYY! (:
holiday!!!

im glad and relieved that ive been doing well at work. i used to complain(like really complaining) with this current job of mine and even thinking of giving it a try first. i sud have just follow the flow and learn as much as i can. absorb everything now Nad! work it out!
i strongly believe now that i can already manage the tasks that was given. with others's helps, im double secured.

little recap.
i did scaling and polishing. EXTRACTION. doing minor x-rays. developing x-rays. doing feelings for gigi berlobang. removal of stitches. ermmmm. did crowning. minor check-ups.
ape lagi ehhh?? wah. lupe. LOL.
most importantly, i managed the sterilization room alone jus now! im not afraid of the trays coming in to be clean. it's kinda eerie ah the room. padahal very open, doors also opened. and bright lights. haiyeeerr. i have to get use to that too i guess.

im currently posted with Dr Yap for the past weeks. and Dr Yap, she took halfday only. so right after assisting her, time for lunch. and after lunch, i have nowhere to go. ya, there i was stationing in the steri. i familiarized lotsa equipments. but sometimes still confused. ((: haha.
and THANKS TO NURUL ASYIKIN for being there to guide me along the way. she also one gonggong. kadang2 pun lupe barang2 kat stu! ISHHHKKK!

ALHAMDULILLAHHHHH!!!!! ((:

Berikanlah Aku kekuatan.

any the wayssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.
last weekend was spend with the love ones again but this time round, it's jus didnt do it.
very very boring!
haiyah. i duno part mane yg boring pun. but can feel the atmosphere somewhat very awkward.
ntah la kan. -_____________________-'ZZZzzzzZZZZzzzZZ
we went all the way to Changi to explore but didnt get the chance. so proceed to East Coast Park for some lepak-ing on the beach with the BITCHES. HAHA.
ape tah steam they decided to go ECP. aku da nk jelak lak kat stu. LOL.
ouh well. i hope bf didnt feel the weird-ness in my friends lor.
pls dun get bored yang pls.
if u dun have later, imma have to ride basikal sey meet them all. sampai hati ke nk buat gtuk??!! 0.o

me and bf cant stop talking/discussing regard Bali. I really cant wait. holiday mahh. sape tk suke kannnn. fuhhh. but financial wise, jadi keliruu. need more bucksssssssssssssssss! insyallah.
haiz. come fast la 22nd April. and come slow k 25th April!
hehehehehe. eh, dalah! tk abes2! pls stop putera and nad!! STOP NOW!

speaking of that guy of mine, AKU RINDUUUU DIERRRRR LAAA!
ermmmm ermm ermmm ermmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

watching american idol now. and i feel like crying. why eh? maybe the song that the 'idols' singing.
i better go now. gotta get this cute lens off my precious eyes! wash face then..

selamat MALAMMMM!

(:

2010-03-25T05:22:00.000-07:00

no work for today. im having backaches and i can't really tolerate nonsenses to add to that.
maybe thanks to you for bringing food to feed me. additional thanks to you too for perah-ing minyak with me. i was merely having this manje2 talk while he behaves like a serious furious man! wth. aku sumpah malas nk layan part mcm tu.
i dunno la whats into him but pls, if u have any problems, u noe u can always talk to me wat.

i noe la this matter very small/tiny u may say tapi plssssssssssssssssssss. im not interested to entertain this craps from u. in short, we dun deserve this shits from each other wat!
and there he goes..... making it worse!
kadang2 susah la aku nk ckp. he tried to act cool padahal dier tau aku paling benci when he acted that way! suke2? BENCI!

i am actually typing this down while he sitted jus right behind me. i dun bother la even if he were to follow wat im typing now. sometimes i need to type this down to let out my anger cos i dun see a point for this small shit to be spread to my close ones unless they asked. so here i am, trying to vent my anger.
i had enough okay darling. u dun have to do this sey actually. funny kan kalau u pikir balek. tol tk?
u always the water whereas im always the fire. tapi sometimes u chose to be the other way round which dun really make me enjoy doing that lorrr. i still love to stay mcm API. and u better joly well stays to be the AIR; always cooling me down in any diff situations im facing.
i noe i noe. poor u. always have to put up with my karena. dats me.
read this: i dun always go disturbing people, unless they disturb me. eat that!
burn me pls.

few mins of silence between me and him.
and there he went giving me panadol extra. asking me to eat it.
damn! mcm nk ketawe tapi tahan. i noe it is meant to ease the pains for my body tapi dlm kepale otak aku lain!
usually kan org ckp, kalau marah2 pasal lupe makan obat! tu la yg aku pikir!! haha. kekek!
aku pun dgn slumber nyeeeeeeee makan tu obat depan dier!

gosh.

can i hug u putela molamad daun????!! HAHA.

BABI.

(he's now in my room, step majooookkk la tuuu! BLUEKKK!)

i wanna go have my shower now. i smell of cheeseburger and chezels!

have fun party people.
and goodnight to the rest! (:

2010-03-22T08:17:00.000-07:00

aku suke bila kau suka. aku gembira, bila kau gembira.
dan aku luka bila kau luka. dan aku juga sedih bila kau sedih.
~random sentences. LOL.

HELLOOOOOOOOO MY SPACEEE!

da lame tk tinggalkan maklumat pape eh. haha.
always semangat 2mins je la aku nie. okayla tu. at least ade jugak kadang2 blogg pe!

so ya, today's MONDAY. tk go keje lagi for today! -_______-'
not lazy, cume lazy to think of wat im suppose to do at work! haiz.
last friday was at home too. neglected work for some relax session @ home.
mampos kan?!
but still, going work for tomorrow. kalau tk, kesian Nurul sayang. penat2 dier dpt kan aku keje nie. must thank her lor. aku suke keje nie actually. lagi2 dkat dgn umah. tapi one thing yg rabak, aku still tkde confidence to serve the DRs la. very the scared u noe. dealing with patients somemore. salah silap, mati siol. GIGI ORANG TAU TU! haiz.

i noe, i noe. it gonna take sometimes to master bende alah nie. aku bangge okay if i can master nie keje. keje dier bukan senang, i tell u. very the pecah otak. perah otak kau dat kind la. && peningkan kepale &&& memenatkan kaki kau berdiri almost 10hrs tau! see!
yakin mau lebih Nad! insyallah.

over the weekend, which is last Saturday's night. small outing with gfs and my bf!
went for sheesha-ing over at Arab St and off to changi airport. changi airport yg paling kekek. da penat2 jalan, tempat yg kite nk gi, under construction! pelik kan! slalu mcm tu laaa! adeee je!
had our early breakfast @ macd. haha. walaupun only the 4 of us, tk sekecoh or wat, tetap everything went on smoothly. and im happy to be around them. ape lagi yg aku nk mintak kan???
and yes pestie, aku slalu percaye kau la. yg penting, aku kenal kau. cukop kenal. i still need my bf to campor org mahh. lagi2 with u guys, must have that bonding!! haha. ntah aku nk kahwin, senang sket. mamat aku da tkya malu2! chey! Nad da ingat kahwin! HAHAHAHAHAHA.
nola, main thing, kite semue happy and tk malu2. nie kan semue natural. i believe in karma tau! kalau tol ade org nk hasrat dengki dgn aku, wait for their turn la. tu part, AKU KETAWE TERBAHAK AJAK APEK NYONYA KETAWE KAN SKALI.
no worries la. small the matter. dun make small matter big2 sudah. RIMAS~ LOL.

&& the previous Saturday's night, we went bowling with the guys. Zira, Naz, Djay, Pendek & Bf.
last min plan mcm biase jugak. met dlm @ Lau Pa Sat around midnite then off to E-hub. Afterwhich we went to merantau around Spore. LOL. Yishun, Woodlands then to home sweet home. Pictures was taken. Ketawe tk abes2. Kecoh pun penah abessss. Me and Bf had fun! it was Bf's first time joining in the crowd and i can see that it's a smooth sailing event. thank GOD!
i soo love them alot. cume kadang2 things have to be a bit diff la kan. we'll jus pray for the better days to come and can kecoh2 lagi. insyallah. nie semue dugaan dari Nye dan kite tk dpt elak mcm mane pun kite cube. so jiyah, have faith aite. (:

i cant wait for this Saturday to come la. like seriouslyyy la.

so tadi pagi, bangon, followed Bf back to his crib, he siap then off to Paya Lebar to send his resignation letter. but, like sial, mcm biase jugak, cisco demanded him to pay certain amount before approving his request. ape lagi, aku suro cabot sudah. mane nk carik tu amount at that very spot! ade memang ade la. tapi like WTHHHHHH! kesian bf. with the sad face. haiz.
kite belah then off to ITE DOVER to look thru Bf's left over modules. sudden changed, Nad pun register ehhhh. LOL.
so i took up Higher Nitec for Business Studies while Bf, Higher Nitec in Mechanical Engineering which he abandoned it years ago. kalau tk, da bes daaaaa!
our luck la kan today. i paid for one module and 10 more to go! fuuuhhh. can make it ke?
April, im a BUSY lady jus for you.
Bf happy sey i passed the entrance test for this course. aku sendiri tkde confidence i can make it. O' level English & Maths paper sey. ALHAMDULILLAH!!!
*loncat2 tinggi2 atas awan!!!*

taking this opportunity to thank dearest Putera for supporting and encouraging me all the way till today. honestly dear, i never been this far to think bout my future and there u are holding my hands moving towards the brighter side of life. I love you sayang. I wish u cud see my heart smiles. Hee. With you, i feel loved. With you, i feel joy. With you, i feel safe. & becos of you, Im here sharing this wonderful gift from HIM.

love miss love miss love miss love ALWAYS, YOU.

2010-03-10T11:07:00.000-08:00

zooworld, im so addicted to u! haha. i noe, zaman da bes or watsoever. yg penting, i ade mase yg terlampau sangat untok melakukan keje cute nie! hee.

okla, since i've yet to start my new work, i better do things that i hope i would have done it earlier on which i cant due to me working my ass off!

alhamdulillah i've been spending this quality time with my peeps and bf and not to forget my bestfrens. looking forward for more outings with u guys before akak kat sini kene balek semule ke alam KERJEEEEE!! BANGONN!! KERJEEE! -____-!

some update for me to reflect back wen i read back this clean shit. (:

my weekend, last Saturday's midnight spend the time with peeps. over to mingarcade for some 'boring k-oking'. betul tk guys?? some have to agree la kan. maybe due to me not joining them earlier made me somehow lost in my own world not knowing what actually happen before they meet me. bf send me to the meeting point and it's at 1am! so ya, i missed la alot of stories here and there. oh wellllll.

inside the k-ok room, i was like layan-ing the rest(yg nyanyi saje) lorr. no fun at all. aku slalu pegi tk rase semendak nie cos im a fan of family cash studio and i bet they can remember my face for some of the staffs there. haha. wat?! wrong meh hobby menyanyi? dari buat keje tk senonoh, lagi afdal kite melalak like nobody business wat!

and lagi mulia i go with bf dua org aje pasal kite due suke melalak happy2!

hmmp!

maybe that day wasnt a good one for some. i hope there wont be like that feeling anymore, anywhere!

at 5am, off to taman jurong's macdonalds to have our early breakfast without Djay along.

ade jugak la kekek part while observing pendek's ways of eating the pancakes blablabla.

kelaka betol la tu anak. very tertip sehingge kan pakai pisau bedek tu pun dier leh terkehel! wth!

and zira wasnt feeling well either. slalunye dier mencekik pagi2 bute! lagi2 big breakfast meal tu!

but too bad, big breakfast tk diherankan olehnye. LOL.

GO SEE DOCTOR LA!!

after meal, off to lepak-ing session.

funny as it seems, but rite after that one person leave je, the fun tros jadi FUNN. why eh?

kecoh or wat la kan.

my sunday,

me and bf came over to bestie, wawa's place to celebrate her bday, her 1st daughter bday as well as her 2nd daughter's. haha. cute amat la bday dorg dkat. as in both with same month and another daughter same date as her. i find it cool lor. *__*

and bf very clever, aku ade la tunggu pat luar rumah aku. dier da sampai, dier kol, dier ckp da kat luar rumah. aku ingat kat lua rumah aku, skali umah wawa. BEST!

he went in without me. -______- dier ingat aku kat dalam. YA ALLAHHH!

kadang mcm nk piyat je telinge dier tau!

anyway, thanks to him for accompanying me to celebrate that joyful day!

& i teared up rite after i saw wawa cried while her daughter holding the knife with her hands to cut that barney's and frens cake!

im happy for her and family. tears of happinessssss. (:

&& babies in the house as usual! i always kene tease sey!

"nad, kau bile lak?" and wawa replied,"next year kan?"

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?

so putera mohd daud, all my besties da beranak penak tau except zira yg berangan bile kahwin nk visit the supermart je bukan pasar! haha.

im sooo looking forward to our bigday too!*berangan mode* ;P

kalau ade rezeki, insyallah eh baby ia eh baby ia eh baby ia ehhhhhh!! hee. *blush*

after that cute-ness event, me and bf lazed at my crib.

unfortunately, lazing around for some laughters turned out to be the other way round.

more tears la okay. i sungguh binget with bf till i again lost control of myself. i kesian bf and i partly blame myself. but he still dun have the rite to do that! NO means NO my dear. part mane yg nk NADHIRAH pahamkan/terangkan lagi. i was too anxious for his answers and member lagi sardin je watch tv ignoring me! wah wah wah! ape lagi, melinting la aku!

at first i was asking with much softness and reasonable ways la. tu pun tk layan!

part aku da start drama mama aku(LOL), baru dier nk react to the situation!

seriously, i hate this kinda effortless ways u did! c'mon la. im doing this for our own good sayang.

bukan suke2 je! u ingat i suke ke nk marah2 suke2?

haiz.

whatever it is, we made up at that very night. naseb tk drag! kalau drag, i panggil tu kumar the dragqueen! u nk??! ^___^$%%4^#$!

i had a stay-home monday. yeke?

haiyo da lupe laa.

yg saye ingat,

tuesday was out with bf to simpang bedok for our late supper. as usual, very ngade2 for me to ask that frm him! (:

and as usual jugak, bf never failed me.

never! maybe small2 matters ade la. but dun fail on feeding me! LOL. tu da case crucial! haha.

planned to prawning with djay, zira n naz but the plan was cancelled at the very last kopek due to NAZ's LATENESS! thanks eh naz. da masok alek spore kul 4plus, ade hati maseh nk ajak lepak!

mintk kene sepak je muke kau tu!

met zira awhile to collect my pink angel frm here, lepak awhile then home sweet home.

me and bf watched astro boy halfway then i tdo first, leaving mr bf alone to layan the cerite. ((:

and today,

alden came over with son in the afternoon to do some makeup works on my gemok face. haa.

bf was the babysitter for the day. pity him okay! he went,"denny, denny, come, come." and he goes like,"denny nk sleep? denny nk susu? denny nk air?" and the list goes on and on and on!

cute la putera kuuuu!

halway jage bdk tu, bf tertdo. (((((: i disturb him like mad lorrrr! he paisey semcm! LOL.

rasekannn la yang! u practice okay!

~alah, u tkya practice pun i can sense that u gonna make a perfect/best/gd/lovable DADDY!

(angkat nad, angkat!) hehehe.

took us almost a day to finish those colourings on my face.

and some of the idea, basically came out frm my fcking mouth! aku ke alden eh yg amik course nie?

haiyah. imagination is important aldennnnn! work it out!!

i sooo love my red lips. someone got red lips tooooo kan kan kan kan?

hahaha. urs sealed with LOVEEE!! muaxxx!

after alden and son left, bf pun surrenderred! LOL.

he went back and leaving me alone, potong sayur while watching American Idols.

great~

im stucked with ZOOWORLDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD now.

zira, naik skg boleh? asal lepak mlm2 bute kat bwh? BALEKKKK! hahaha.

today's THURSDAYYYYY.

gonna do some chores later morning and back to bed. hahahahahah.

nola, zooworld. noolaaaaa, tv. nooola, potong sayur.

nola, lepak. nola, daydreaming.

NO LA, I'M MAKING SOMEONE JEALOUS COS IM HAVING THE BEST TIME OF MY LIFE RESTING MY CUTE BUTT @ HOME not SWEATING OUT A SINGLE SWEAT!

Tebyia, kalau sweat, lap sendiri k.

WEE~ love disturbing u honey! muaxxx!

pape jumpe pat zooworld people. HAHAHA.

2010-03-04T05:38:00.000-08:00

last night was damn fun i should declared. i miss hanging out with dudes and peeps ive known long time ago. and so, we reunited.
but that doesnt mean we did something special to make the outing fun. it's always the laugheters, jokes and selengeh masing2 yg buat kite happy!
true enuf, i still dun get enuf of it. damn.

met up with zira darl over at my place and dashed awhile to send quick cash(lol) to her uncle which we actually made a mistake by knocking on someone else's house! damnfcuk la kite nie!
it was actually scary for me la cos zira actually said that her granddad's living in her uncle's place. and we did saw a person lying helplessly(smarang je!) in this particular house. and of cos it was dark and dat's why we got ourselves knocking on some indian resident's house. haha.
dat was funny la babi.
we still managed to get to her uncle's place with the help of zira's dad. siang2 bukan nk kol bapak nye tau! kan da ketok salah rumahhhh! LOL.

after that, i bought myself slurpee from 7-11 then off we went to chill while waiting for the rest to come.
djay, naz, pendek and syasha came around midnite.
had a great chat with pestie before they came. semue org pun de masalah dlm dunia nie. selagi kite hidup, begitu jugak la masalah tk kan henti2 dtg menghantui kite. be strong darling.
rite after they came, we shifted our butts to pendek's crib while he freshen up himself. we pee-ed(haha!) then off to lake park which is rite behind pendek's crib.
dat's the stupidest place ever to chill cos it seems to be wind-less la kan smlm and left us sweating and melekit-ing like hell.
talked craps, sang old school songs and off back to my crib. LOL.
they wanted downstairs while me and zira went up to do settle some stuffs.
mum was asking me to withdraw some cash so i have to take the atm card lorrr.

off to atm machine and off to the 7-11 again(for me and zira!).
i wanted to buy food but it seems that this tekak wont telan even my fav bun frm 7-11 i always been eating at the old workplace.
i think the medicine is working my dear. haha.
we then lepak over at pendek's void deck which is still full of mosquitoes around sucking our blood.
and it's bintat! not bintik!(inside joke!)
and they played cards while me and zira jus joining in the fun by looking and yak yakk kediyakk away.
and came those smart looking blue uniformed guys.
ape lagiii, the pak polisi lorr.
got screened and was told that there's one house breaking case involved a bangladesh man wearing white tee running towards our area which we dun even see anyone walking wearing white tee.
but after they left, all the apek and nyoya wearing white tee appeared from nowhere and of cos we joked bout it and laughed our ass off. haha.

syasha went back after more than one hour session over at the void deck. left with the 5 of us.
more laughters after that. and more perangai babi la kan. kalau nk tdo, lain kali jgn lepakk!
kate torn(word lame siol) peeee! i had fun. seriously. i want can? naz is the babi-est among all. the sampok song guy adds up with the detailed lady, kene la sangat. korg da mcm laki bini kelaparan and ended up eating my boost choc away.
i would like to thank pestie for this wonderful priceless treat. i enjoyed it so much till i hope our meetups will be anytime soon. gelojohhh nah~

thank u baby putera for giving me the chance to become an owl for a night, finding freedom and happiness with my other owl frens. haha. da lame sey the feeling tk mcm nie. no need to go party, or do anything la. sit, talked crap je da cukop to make me smile widely till now.
and i so miss babyboifey so fcking much.
will be meeting u tomorrow. (: ily baby ia.

& yeah, tomorrow's a 3rd interview session in my life.
pray for me guys. GOOD LUCK NADDDDDYYYY!

better get my ass off frm this bed and grab the food mum bought for me. she has been screaming my nameee since jus now!
after that, im gonna find the wears im gonna put on tomorrow.

let this be a good one too. Amin.

2010-03-02T12:26:00.001-08:00

i freaking love PUTERA MOHD DAUD la okay.

i dun even noe what is he actually thinking.

he came over frm JB at around 12pm and off to see Dr Syed for my medication then off to Vivo for our another shopping spreee!
boleh tahan terok eh. shop till we dropped.
2pm-10pm at Vivo. wth.

got myself another Zara Tee and a blouse. I got myself a dress from sheer romance(bf persuaded me), 2cute pants from Cotton On, lappy case from Ripcurl and more.
not to forget, our movie date. we watched 'Dear John' and the show mengakal!
buat org nangis! haha. i think my bf pun de nangis jugak la. tapi nk step cool je.
cite dier sedih. must go watch.
we took almost 3hrs to watch that show.
we then continued our hunting. part tu, kaki badan semue nye da sakit!
betol la tk bedek. da lame maybe i never buat keje2 mcm nie kan.
oh yaaa. last stop, we ended it in TANGS.
mampos~ bf suro buy Triumph Bra okay!!
i never ever imagining myself wearing/buying this bra brand!
cekik duit org je! harge dier melampau!!
fair enuf, to his request, i tried the pretty bra.
i then fell in love with it. apeee lagiii. hee.
i spend almost 500bucks for all the items, including movie's tix, late lunch @ Pastamania and bf's clothes. but still. i dun lose any. Bf did.
dat's why. i dunno what is he reallyyyy thinkinggggg!

Terima Kasih yang for semue nie. mungkin stakat berterima kasih pat u memang tk boleh ditandingkan dgn ape u beri.
dgn ikhlas u beri, dgn ikhlas i mendoakan kesejahteraan u.
i wish him happiness and wellness everyday and slamenyeee!
insyallah kalau rezeki i lebih, i pulak la nk buat u jadi org kaye sehari. (:
thanks for giving me this opportunity to feel loved and appreciated and feeling2 'rich' woman for awhile.
will always remember this moment baby.
i NEVER felt this way and NEVER know why u did this for me.
tk keje mcm nie pun dpt imbalan nye? gosh.
may Allah bless u yang. murahkan rezeki u and can shop lagiii. oh, salah eh?
sorry. -___-'
happy la sangattttt.

BALI will be the next hot thing to think off. baru leh relax one corner.
i can smell the beach and the Spa is soooo waiting for us.
im trying to find xtra moolahs so that we cud enjoy to the fullest!
insyallah.

the laassttt thing in mind, my interview over at Nurul's place this Friday.
pray for me babies. biar la gaji kurang ke, same ke, at least my heart and soul happy sudahh.
goodluck naddy.

im the luckiest person on Earth, baby.

2010-03-01T12:22:00.000-08:00

random pixies taken. sesungguhnye, aku sayang BF AKUUUUU!!!
stay tuned and u'll noe why! heh!

last friday was my last day of work at Bio. it's kinda sad tho eventhough i noe there's no little spot for Bio in my heart already.

u noe la the feeling of got to leave the place filling up with lotsa sweet memories.

susah la nyahhh.

at first i tried to hold my tears but not till i met with Auntie Irene, housekeeper for Bio and Mr Eric Tan Biopolis Protection Officer.

they made me teared up like hell. klaka wen i think back. gosh.

i dunno la. maybe org2 tua kan slalu have the power to buat us cry/sad!

whatever it is, da 2 hari aku tkya drag myself to work! haha.

Saturday and today, Monday. and for later Tuesday and for till dunno when la.
risau mode for not applying any jobs for now.

rase2 mcm nk rest jekkkk la dulu! hee.

on last Saturday was over to Zira's crib for some late night movie.
before that, we went to Vivo to meet up with Kak Su& Daughter and Linda for my farewell's treat. Earl's swensen it was. Thanks to Kak Su for that lovely dinner. and sorry for the long wait.

siak betol la kite zira kasi org2 tua tunggu! haha.

after makan, relax awhile near the laut2 there and tadaaaa. saye dpt Angel? lilo and stitch nye kawan eh? lol.

seriously, i dun la okay ape binatang tuu. cos i nvr watch cartoon for soo long.

thanks again for that lovely soft thing.

lokasi bear2 tu skg: teban gardens tingkat dua, tepi katil zira.

haha.

i cant bring home bear2 for now cos of yesterday's outing.

with the guys this time round. our very own Biopolis Ofiicers. Certainly not all of them ade kat stu.

cume melayu2 nye je. celebrating Kak Su's birthday as well.

before i lupe, went over to Ben&Jerry's at Dempsey Hill rite after Bf fetched me from Jiyah's place.

a simple yet memorable treat sayang. thank you for that. ((:

meeting the guys at 8pm at ming Arcade for kalaoke session. up till 11plus pm.

thanks guys for coming down and making it happen.

im so gonna miss people like u guys yg suke buat aku ketawe tk abes2! haiz.

we sure gonna meet up again for another melalak session. okay?

takecare people.

reached home after midnight smlm. then potong sayur, talked to Bf abit then we ZZzzzz.

Bf was like berpeloh mcm babi! lol.

i was covering the kipas la frm him, dats why. sorry la. mane la i tau u kat position mane.
haha. he ended up tergarok2 mcm beroookkk. -___-'

woke up early today and slept back only to realise that it was almost evening.

lincah2 siap then off to pay Bf's installment.

after that, off to town.

Bf wanted to get me some clothes and tried finding it in Desigual, Forever 21, cotton on, levis but to no avail. i also dunno why baik baju aku tk suke laaaaa.

kalau online, mcm2 nk beli!

i den got myself a Zara Tee. and Bf got himself a Zara Man's Jacket. kauu.. the harge also not bad.

and Bf got himself a Nixon watch, harge pun cantik!

his two items je harge da like this new lappy of mine which Bf just bought for me too.

OH YESSSS! i got myself a notebook!! at last! i can return my old lappy to the old flame.

((: hapinesssssssssssss tk terhingge.

i dunno la tapi Bf very baik la kan. THANK him for doing all this for me. I noe i've not been treating u well rite from the start. i didnt expect this in return pun sey. memang ade la jugak i bragged that i wanted a laptop so much so can ease the burden im always dealing with. and i need that this that this.

tapi as his Gf, i really noe and can see his susah-ness. he also have to pay his debts, whatsnot and his daily needs.

so finally, i got this SHOPPING-YOK-SHOPPING feeling! oh yeahhh. we'll be doing it again tomorrow and hopefully i can get something for myself. a real something la.

jgn la tengok t-shirt je NADDDD! insyallah.

he said:"i giving u 200 to spend."

and that's another shocking moment for meeeeeeeeeeee.

betol, sumpah tk bedek.

warming up with dearest LG lime greeny right now. webcaming with Pestie and testing2 here and there. still need to do lotsa downloading. anti-virus and bla bla bla. nie la susah ade bende baruuu.

tetap i sukkkeeeeee!

terime kasih sayang ku.

Adek sayang Abang. eh sala eh?

Akak sayang Abang. eh sala eh?

okaylaaa.

Ayang sayang Abang.... (gelinye!!)

hehe.

tkya ckp pape la. u noe i always love you my gulahati!!

U just blew me away~

2010-02-25T01:25:00.000-08:00

day: thursday.
tomorrow's friday. whatttt??!
oh yeah, im getting my butt away frm here tomorrow onwards.
dun miss me people. hahaha.
now im halfway packing my stuffs to be brought home later.
lucky he's fetching me. kurang siket beban hambe.

yesterday was stay home, never go work day.
yala, cant wake up lagi. wat else?!
evening time, darling accompanied me at home and played the DVD player for some Bali feeling show.
yup, u heard me! BALI. non-stop talking bout it.
the Indon's show ade shooting @ Bali lorrr. cos of that we, the curious couple, watched it.
night time, had dinner and some snacks.
potong sayur, main game bowling dlm hp bf, bf sleep, i watched fashionista's diaries then im off to lala land.
cuddled up and both gone to dunno wer till tk leh bangon.
he suppose to go work! and as usual, im late for work just now.
took cab and now struggling to wait for another 30mins to knock off from here.
doing nothing much except changing of my blogskin here and there.

later on, at 7.30pm meeting Wan Doink for some interview session with dearest Bf.
we trying to get this part time job. haha.
jus TRYING. insyallah.

so Tebyia, later dun forget to take many snaps of me and precious Bio.
i dun wanna rely on my camera anymore jus becos of my bloody irrit memory card!
still not showing any good signs to me la this mangkok SD!
it's okay. hp u kan maut kan yang?
so let me flood it with my oh so beautiful face! NOT!
hee.

got to go now.
emptying this shelves and drawers for the next better player!
have fun and all the best for dunno-who-yet-gonna-replace-me-here.

im moving on~

2010-02-23T00:04:00.000-08:00

i love this boy like alottt! more than alot!

yesterday was over to Cathay Cineleisure for The Little Big Brother movie.
two thumbs up la okay!
happy giler la watching that show. kinda hilarious too laaaa. ape tk nye, ade Jackie Chan siol.
the funny "little man".
i wasnt feeling good bout Putera's choice of movie at first but TADAAAA!
the show turned out to be the one im gonna watch again sooon!
beli cd dier dari JB please yang.
LOL.

we was laughing like hell, till I dunno why I laughed more when I heard Put's laughter!
very cute la kau!
never once did i not want to be with you by my side sayang.
Thanks for treating me. Not forgetting the cornetto ice cream and the cup corn!
He did asked me whether I wanna have a meal before the show starts.
But like yaya payaya(always), I said NO!
I very full. HAAHAHAHAHA.
turned out, aku mcm org kelaparan before the show starts.
okay, sorry okay. i only love junkfoods my dear. u lupe ke?
hee.
feel like jelak like dat la eating fast food again and again.
but my bf suke banget dgn KFC dier. sket2 KFC! hmmmp.
tapi tk montel2! i jealouusss sey!

i dun think im looking forward to my next 'job'.
it seems like forever thinking bout it. gosh!
how i hate to undergo this kinda feeling now and then.
ape sey.. nape seyy.. haiz.
let this be a good one please.
i noe i cant count much on my dearest people.
all i gotta do now is to pray hard and think positively and work it out baby!
insyallah.

nothing beats the joys im having down here. haiz.
im soooo ohhh gonna miss this place!
im taking lotsa snaps before i leave okay! haha.
gimme 1 week or so then after that, i delete la.
LOL.

not looking forward for this weekend since dear Bf have to work!
must understand okay. kan nk kumpul duit for Bali then he can treat me for shoppingggg!
nyehhahahahaha.
nola, i too gonna find ways to get those cash to shop!
cant wait la ehhh for that trip baby iaa.
i had this feeling that we gonna have soo much fun there and confirm tknk balekkkk! hee.
then we can enjoy the spa treatment there, the beaches, the sun, the waves, the people, the everything la in Bali.
okayla, enough of BERANGAN-ing!
nanti tk menjadi kanggg!

and jus great, lupe nk bwk my Acer charger! naseb ade Hp Mini nie. Thank GOD!

i better layan this Pritham(P.officer) before he ulangkan sentence dier lagiii, iaituuu:
"YOUR LAST DAY COMING SOON, U BETTER TALK TO US MORE LAH!"
and i dun even noe what else to talk about selain talking about what's gonna happen to my LIFE after this episodes!
DAMN..

yes, im currently on this mode. For goodness sake! -__-'

2010-02-22T00:33:00.000-08:00

random pic i found.

im his fierce LION.

&

u're my charming TIGER !!!

&&

jiyah, u're my beautiful/powerful dragon!

okay tk people? weee~

kan i da ckp kan?
it wasnt me who never go to work.
instead, it was u laaaa bacin!
LOL.
bf talked like real only! and i was the one sleeping quite late ditemani oleh zira darling.
tetapi, org yg tdo siang dari saye, tk leh bangon la plak.
but naseb he kejot!
kalau tk, abesss kamu ya hakim!

it's almost time for me knock off.
cepat mase berlalu. (:
and it really bothered me like alot if i were to think of the coming day that im gonna leave this place.
haiz.
like wise, i hope it's gonna be a successful exit for me.
tknk la cry2 baby cos i realised whenever they talked about me leaving, this tears have this auto mode nowadays. it can simply flow out mcm suke hati mak bapak dier. haa.
no regrets nad.
tk kan nk stuck for ur entire life kat sini kan?
crazyy sey.
insyallah, i'll get used to it soon.
takecare okay Bio. u no noty2 asyik nk ask people to fall in love to one another jee!
like me and dear bf!
Bio la puncenye.
i sud thank Bio la actually.
see! that's another reason for having this difficulties to move on!
4 more days to go baby. );

i wanna take this time to Thank my dearest so far away(padahal pat teban je), Zira for putting up with my late nights nonsense and to give advises and thoughts which I dun expected that frm her. it has been awhile since we meet up.
last was my bday celebration i guess. and that wasnt a gd last meet up tho. i apologised if there's any possible reasons till it turned out that way. u noe me best. i wont do anything harsh towards u and so, whatever it is, i hope we stay the same like before. Eventhough now i dun bother u much by sleeping over or meeting u to chill, there's always the intentions there. how i wish we living next to each other so bile tk asap, i can count on u. tkya nk count on put!(inside joke.LOL)
yes pestie, u still my number one best! and at times like this, bile aku ngah emo2 and pikiran, u were there.
awwww~ nad ade je la bile da smangat blog2 nie.
siappp koranggg! will be talk of my blog! hee.
alah, bukan selalu!!

i better see put's fb now to tag myself since memory card maseh kasi aku problem!
haiz.

he's fetching me today! eeeyeah!
catching a movie but still planning cite ape yg kite nk g tengok!
pls dun rain, my sexy sky.
u look jus fine now with ur white silky fluffy wools. hahaha.
okay serious, dun rain!
(:

No one goes through life without struggles or obstacles.

2010-02-20T09:03:00.000-08:00

day: SATURDAY.
and im at home right now with tebyiaaaa.
and and we just carried each other awayyyy. hahaha.

im looking forward to chill out with him but have to wait for N to get back here.
nie la susah nye jage org yg kite tk kenal! haha.

dats all for now.
update again soon!

& i cant wait for Monday to come.
i miss Biopolis oh so much. ):

love, nad.

2010-02-19T11:18:00.000-08:00

nice qoute eh?

erm. it was indeed a terrible day yet i hope i'll get through.

not in the mood for work. 4days straight eh okay tk go work plus today.
urgh. there's always something stopping me tapi wen think back, no reasons actually.
i miss bio lagi ade! 0.0' did i jus typed that?
feel like going to work tomorrow but still sedih tk dpt gajiiii.
kalau ye pun nk hold gaji org, boleh bilang ape! nie tdak!
and i was about to help someone who's really in need sey.
damn.
but too bad. gaji tk masok, nad mcm budak bongok! ape lagi kannn!
):

cite nye sebenarnye mcm gnie.
lemme detail abit so pape nanti, aku leh kenangkan cite dongeng nie.
N called me in the evening while I was happily watching tv and surfing net.
it was an emergency call frm her. kanchiong aku skejap!
i then as usual, decided to help without bother to think far.
wat for? member in need kan.
well, i helped with sincerity. unless others! haha.
mcm mengunkit eh. NOT!
me not like that.
and it reminds me of my old 'BEASTie', Shahida. LOL.
ntah mane la dier skg.
N had the same fate but not the same storyline ah. yg Shahida nye kekek seribu. hee.
i helped and got shits frm her. and obviously, aku jugak la yg kene lap taik dier!
gosh. kwn makan kwn dan ade hati nk mintk aku tolong.
please eh. i helped but i dun ask anything in return but pls keep ur dirty hands away frm my property. ishk ishk.
kekek betol wen i think back laaaa.

and back to N's story.
she now here with me. not to forget her branded goods.
yg nie, can i get my hands on it ????? +.+!
no okay. pegang2, feeling2 okay la. tkmo rompak!
memang kalau jual kat flee market, sure laku. semue original babe.
and she gave me a cute pants and a Mango blouse.
wah, sesungguhnye aku tk mintak pun. -.-'

yup, she will be staying here for a night. ohhh. plus her cousin sis is here with me too.
naseb 2nd brother keje malam. kalau tk, mane aku nk sumbat dorg?
ermmm. all i know that i already asked Mum's and Bro's permission. fair enuf la kan?
poor thing la her.

puncenye of course dari si JANTAN SUNDAL YG TK RETI NK BERTANGGUNGJAWAP ATAS KESILAPAN NYE! i wonder la. knape la lelaki nie kadang2 have the cheek to kenal2 with us, girls then lepas whatever yg da satisfy diri mereke, tros senyapppp!
fuck this MEN! naik benci aku perangai nie mcm.

lucky for me, i didnt get that sort of person! yg dpt asyik yg terover jage! haha.
which is good at times. true? haha. bersyukur la kamu nadddd.
of cos im refering to my one & only dearest! muah muah! JGN SENYUM2 SENDIRI!
;P
i miss him alot. due to this, we talked skejap je over the phone. apologise for scolding u and all.
u sud understand sayang. im dealing with something u wouldnt want to deal with.
thanks for saying sorry padahal i yg sensitive(i think). :(
im trying my best to console her my dear. she trusted me and dats why she's depending on me now.
aku nie tk la kaye like her. shelter for her to at least berteduh and hope that she can ease her mind abit.
trust me sayang. i dun do things if i now i cant. as much as u appreciate and treasure ur fren, i too have to play my part here.

sedih la kan kene undergo all this shits after feeling2 happy for soo long.
N sendiri ckp that she tk pernah kene mcm nie. hidup mewa all the wayyyy.
skali jadi mcm gnie, she tros blankkk! kesian dier.
she's indeed a good fren to laugh with and talk with.
dier pun pemurah hati.
because of that,
dier jadi mcm gnieee!
she's rich i tell ya. gave helps to all sorts.
after all the good deeds, ape N dapat?!
N O T H I N G. read that.
i also cant stand this sort of people! org lain nye kebahagian, kau tk perlu amik tau dan tk perlu nk tompang gembire unless u're related to her.
seluar dalam satu2 pun tk cuci dalam satu washing machine dgn dier, korg happy2 took advantages of her.
please laaa. da tua kan? pikir boleh tk?
aku dengar pun, aku yg jadi malu! PERANGAI SATU2 MCM MINTAK KENE LUDAH KAT MUKE KORG!
tk malu ke?
then again, memang her fault la suke2 buat charity. not to blame them fully la kan.
pemurah hati lagi. abesss laaaaa kauuu.
ishk ishk ishk.

nie lagi hot. aku langsong tk rapat with her. jumpe 3kali like that je.
nape aku?
naseb kau la nad.
always helping. tapii. i chose the right one to receive this small gift frm me.
ive learned la okay.
she'll be out tomorrow and all the best for her & the childrens.
Dear MR _A_L,
KAU LOSER LA SIAL. fullstop!

hanya tuhan saje yg tau perasaan aku skg kerana terlalu mengharapkan!
makan rumput la kau nad besok, luse dan tulat.
calling the HR tomorrow by hook or by crook. main game taik! nk hold gaji org, boleh bilangggg peeeeee!
i know ive tendered. dgn tk kasi org prepare nie semue, ape maksod nye?
blardy arse. binget to the maxx!
naseb la bf da tdo. kalau tk, dier la jadi mangse aku membebel non-stop hit!
bf, better find ways to feed me. nanti i kuros how?
SUKEEE JEE KAUUU KAN !
nie lagi satu nye BIG ASS BOY! hee. (__,__)<-- ur bontot!
ILOVEYOULABACIN!

EEEEEEEE! i wont be okay till bf ckp it's gonna be alright!
I NEED THAT! QUICK YAYANGGGG!
before keyboard nie pecah, baik aku stop typing!

work or no work? sleep or layan lappy?

gasak kau la nad.

im out!

dan yg nie, cute gilerr! (:

2010-02-18T07:50:00.000-08:00

bf's on the way back to his place. i already missing his belo-ness.
hee.

oh gosh, skipped work again today. cant really wake up!
no more for tomorrow eh Nadhirah.
c'mon! 1 weekday to go!
):

went to Jb to teman Bf and got ourselves Ramli's burger to munch while waiting for Blackberry to siap. haha.
Mandikan/ bersihkan moto Putera ler.
straight off to BBDC, dun even noe why actually his intention.
reminds me of those days going for pracs. haiz.
and i told bf that i wanna continue my prac then was like, 'Go laaa.'
wah, dulu tk kasi! Suro amik class 3 tros.
chey! jahat kan kau!
insyallah.
provided u ajar i laaaaaa. tknk pakai motor betol. ade tk? hee.

and of cos, spend abit more with bf at home. potong sayur yet again.
then surfed net till now.

gaji jus around the corner.
not really looking forward for it tho.
only looking forward to spend time with bf. hahahahahaha.
pun kene pakai duit ehhhh.
haiyah, dun wanna even think bout gajiiiii!

and and and.
dun think too much for the future sayang.
insyallah. we'll just have to make more efforts to achieve our goals. (:

nothing else to say.

everything's gonna be okay, dear Putera.

goodnight & sugardreams.

2010-02-17T07:16:00.000-08:00

u make me smile, please stay for awhile now.
just take your time, wherever you go.

wont update till my memory card give way to me to upload the beautiful pictures.
haiz. perangai eh nie SD! last warning. nothing can be done, im gonna get a new one!
hmmp.

had fun and loved spending time with dear Putera.
falling in love all over again with you, boy.

advance gifts, surprise gifts and belated gifts was done perfectly and im so loving this simple yet pretty ring on my fingerrrrr.
Thank you handsome prince!
update more with pixies!

any the waysssssss,
got my OWN modem already.
alot thanks to my brother, Matsah for paying 90% for this.
And thanks again for all the helps u provided me!
Love you my "bedek" daddy!

gonna be busy surfing all night long. Nyehahaha.

cant wait for Bali baby!

i better leave my lappy one corner first and go wash my face plus cut the veggies!
my part time job okay! $5. ((:
im happy for Mum's new job too.

HAPPY CNY CINASSS!

&&

HAPPY 1year ANNIVERSARY HONEYBEE!

MUAXXXXXXXxxXXxxXXXX!

2010-02-10T20:33:00.000-08:00

wah, still cant believe that he actually did surprised me.
haha.
was over to ECP for fresh air but it turns out to be 'an advance surprise for Pebyia!!'

Thanks me love.

Honestly,
I was having that bad day moment yesterday and really hoping for some miracle to bring me back on my feet.
I really had terrible feelings thinking of what actually went wrong.
I myself been clueless and all I did was think, answer to myself and cry.
Oh ya, cry baby.
Maybe I think too much and everything.
And the fact that I'm gonna be leaving Bio soon, lagi terok la jadinye.
Seriously, it gonna be damn hard for me to leave this place.
I grew up here man! Haha.
Each and every memories I had here really means alot to me.
Haiz.
Life still gotta move on right?
Hoping for the better one in a new environment.
Rest assured outside of job, all at UPL and Bio are frens past, present and continue into the future.
Amin.
15 more days to gooooo.
-__-'

and it's exactly 15mins after my lunch break ended.
went to pollute the air with Ati sayang then now I'm back to this boring scene of mine.
I so cant do this anymore.
Felt so useless down here.
Well, a tap on my back for surviving up till now.
What?! 4 years already okay.
Alhamdulillah.
My learning journey will end soon.
It has been a wild experience for me tho.
Be it in a good or bad one, I'm sure to keep in me always.
daaaaaa, enuf said for Biopolis.

Any the ways,
I'm happy for Ati sayang for enduring all the obstacles she had to go through before her big day which will be on this Sunday.
Happy Advance Engagement sayangg!
You are one strong gf I've ever known.
May Allah bless you and family always!
I so cant wait too. Sexcited for u dear. Saturday, sleeping over her place for the final touchup or whatever yg perlukan energy guer.
Frankly speaking, we're not that close last time but we're NOW and hope that our friendship
gonna stand forever.
My sexy gf and her sexy botakhubby.

Love you la so much bacin. ((:

Still thinking of what to do next after blogging this.
Boring la bf tk leh reply whenever I text during this kinda hrs cos his wplace tk leh kai hp!
Haiyaaaaa.
The stupid SD memory card pun ngah carik pasal for not letting me upload yesterday's pixies.
Bodoh kauuu!
Beli baru and dump u one corner then u noe!

That's all folks.
Gonna update soon kalau de mase and peluang.

Anxiously waiting for our big day to come Putput!
(((((:::::
Many thanks again for putting back smiles on my face smlm.

Without you, I will cry!

Hee.

Missing and loving you every seconds.

MUAXX!
____________________________

2010-02-09T21:45:00.000-08:00

Love me till I die.

Such a wonderful day before today,
Pain in my heart has gone astray.
As I reflect back yesterday's,
I hope for the better Wednesday.

Not everytime is a wonderful one,
Not every moment is meant for you to whine.
Not every second for you to shine.
And not anything or everything except you can refine.

Sorry always seems to be the easiest way to say,
Sorry always seems to be the only word we used at the of the day.
Sorry means alot more than what it is,
Sorry didnt show how one's feels.

Tears reminded me of my lonely nights,
Tears been bothering me before I say my Goodnight.

Never leave me to complete ME.

I need you to erase all sorrows and bring me a better tomorrow.

___________________________________________________________________

2010-02-07T21:30:00.000-08:00

Putera,
many words I would like to say to you but all dun seems to matter.
words cant describe the real way I feel for you.
words also cant express the real feelings that's so and too strong which I cant deny towards you.

You are not the one I wish for cause I've been wishing for someone that's less greater than you.
Alhamdulillah.
I wouldnt wanna ask for more now.
And the only wish I had in me now is..
Ohhh. It wont be a wish anymore if I were to say it now.
Hopefully everything's gonna turn out the way I want it to be! Hee.

Back to the mushy mushy part.
Dear,
I'm sorry for every lil and single thing I've done wrong since our day 1 together.
I know I've been the not so good gf right? ):
I love the way U pampered me.
I love the way U say sorry eventhough U're nt at fault.
I love the way U soo manje with me.
I love the way U tease me whenever I gets angry.
I love the way U cheer me up with you stupid/funny/annoying jokes whenever I'm real angry at you!
I love you la baby. I really do.
I know I can be a very stubborn/degil/jahat/bising/fierce gf. )):
But I'm actually a sweet person tau. Hee.
U should know by now darling. (:
Marah2 sayang laaa tuuu. ((:
Eventhough I, Nadhirah dunno the right loving way to coax you everytime U sulked.
I just dunno cos U so damn MANJE till I,myself scared if my pujok tk works on you.
Sorry love.
Jahat jahat Me for always scolding you for got reasons la but sometimes you dun like the way I say things. For that, I'm sorry too.
And the way I always bully you. ):

You're one purest person sayang.
Even my mum and sister and Wawa said that by the look on your face.
Yala, at times pun ade jugak you JAHAT!
People nvr see! Haha.
But no matter what, U still my sweetest sweet heart sayang.
Walaupun U memang cekik darah at times/all the times, I redha.
Chey!

Nothing more and nothing less that can make me regard of having U in my life.
Cos U have changed the way I think for guys, the way I think of my life, the way I think of myself and many many more changes that I've already achieved.

Thanks for the trust U have in me and the trust I shall forever treasure.
Insyallah.
You never have doubts about me especially on guys.
That's double greatful sayang.
Appreciate all ur kindness and the ability to make me want you more.
Haha.

I'm so in love with you my boy.

and and

I still cant believe that we're nearing to our first big ONE anni.
gosh.
We've been thru ups and downs, inside and outside.
Our flaws and all.
Even if it's still a fresh so called baru baru relationship,
I'm willing to go thru everything anything with you dear.

Tk abes la kalau mcm gnie I cakap2 sayang.
((:

Well,
happy reading gemok.
Dun cry okay. HEEEEEEHEEEE.

Love and Miss you honeybeebumbumbummmmm!

Always remember, this girl below here,
will always loveeee youuuu & be there for you.

MUAXXX !

2009-12-12T11:04:00.000-08:00

5463782984003982772 months i didnt blog in or even logging in here.
as usual, lappy's always not in the mood to entertain my needs.
there it goes again... everything cant seems to stay perfectly fine. only for a moment or two and that SUCKSS lorr.

few more days and it's 2010.
cepat nye mase telah berlalu..
and really, this year,
many missions have yet to complete.
insyallah.

my fingers memang very itchy lately.
nk blog sangat tapi bile da dpt log in, nk type ape pun tk tau.
nyehhaaaa.

out with love jus now and back to his crib.
escort-ing session tomorrow and i hoping for the best to happen.
darling know i know.
it doesnt matter anyway.
to me, seriously, what's past is past.
the only thing we cannot let go will be..

the BIG UGLY mouth PEOPLE !

let shut their mouth shall we baby?
*evil's laugh*

Sajna Re is the new and latest hit song for us. Go listen to it.

Okayla, better have our rest now.
wouldnt wanna let the rest wait for us tomorrow morning.

till then. till my lappy's okay. till the network at home kasi muke kat AKU !

insyallah i'll be back typing craps and shits.

Good night Saturday.
Hello Baby Sunday.

runnninggg out~

2009-08-07T00:10:00.000-07:00

hellloooooo!!
((:

taddddaaaaa....

its this thingss ive been eyeing for. watched the video from Xiaxue's blogspot last 2days and i am so falling in love with it. i told dear bf that i wanna loan cash frm him first to buy the set cos the offer till 16 Aug jeeee. haven get my Aug pay by then. so i text my bf up regarding this. fuh! dgn rela hatinye dier izinkan akuuu. but i still haven survey those stuffs, aku da berangan nk purchaseee!
snce its their 1st anni, they selling it at a cheap price for 3items. usual price 200plus. i bought for 138 only. tk ke murah tu? hope it works on me. tried yesterday. was very jaaakkooonn! bf, ur turn soon! feel the blop blop on ur face okay. ((:

& so, smlm before we watch the movie UP(which i will highlite on it later), there's a promotion going on at the ground floor of Plaza Singapura. guess wat?? its by SASA la okayyyy. hehe.
yesyes, beauty talk products ade kat stuuuu!!! ape lagi, we went to have meal at KFC then grabbed bf to that small fair. haha. he confidently ask me to buy without further say. omg! i was like kene force siaaa! padahal he have to pay for it. siao la he!
then after much browsing and kene marah oleh bf i, we proceeded to the counter to pay. oh, not forgetting the nude glow lip gloss i grabbed. hehe. mentel sekali!!
suddenly i felt so stupid sey rushing to get those stuffs. mcm tk perlu. tapi sungguh unik la bende nieeee!!!! sud try la people.

see this video below okay. sumpah, very tempting to buy. ((:

ya Allah, aku sungguh beruntung. Alhamdulillah.
bf final say... "take it as ur bday present cos i dunno wat to get for u. since u like it, den u dun have to pay already."
haiz......
me and big mouth and my big desiresss! tengok la ape dier da buat!
alah.. tau tk beli sey.. can buy clothes ke,watch ke.. see see see! cant get enuf of anything. hehe.
advance bday gift frm the bf!! thanks sayanggg. i sungguh terharu. awww~~~
MACEH putera mohd daud ya hakim bin A. ily muchy much.

UP was hell of a funny show. cant stop laughing. part of the show was damn sad la. i almost teared up man. but still focus and step cool. LOL. bf was like hugging and say,"tkmo nangis ia..". wer i got cryyy! yayang nie!! haiyoo!
trully touched my heart every single part of it. & seriously, at times, i imagined growing old with putera like in the show. da mcm aku and dier plak.. the old man wearing specs ma. so is putera. then the wife is a loud hailer one, so is ME!! hahaha. u better watch and u laugh okayy.
i wanna watch it again and this time, i really wanna cry la. haha. NAD GILER!

thank u bf for bringing me out yesterday and that not so surprise gift from u. hehehe. no la, i still dunno how to say thank u to u. i kiss u later la. hehe.
meeting him again later. woot woot!

im actually quite sleepy and tired. but still drag myself just to make myself happy.
cos meeting bf is the instant happinesssss! haha.

happy national day to all and have a great weekend!!

love,
nad.

(:

2009-08-05T23:38:00.000-07:00

wahhhhhh. da lame seyy tk bloggg!
2-3months plus already. hehe.
well, pardon me. keyboard and wireless at home being sucha babi!
dats y mood akak ilang nk bloggggg.

im now at work, secretly logging in here. haha.
kene tangkap, mampos akuu!
okay2, nk manje2 sket dgn blog aku nie. hehe.

ermmm, how shall i start.....

firstly, this month, ive been falling real sick thrice. and for the record, i was given 3days MC last week. not forgetting another 2days MC the previous week. haha. Dr Loi trying to be sooo good to me. *mcm paham*. even he didnt believe i was sick when i visited him. babi!!
bf got sick too. and lets blame him for my second fever-ation. thanks ehh yayang. haha.
aku la gatal nk jage dier konon. i gave him my Stormery treatment. biasela kain aku soaked dlm baldi yg penoh dgn air batuuu! hehe. gave him medicine and dodoi him to sleep. or i was the one to sleep first?? LOL.
amazingly, he was feeling abit better the next day. so ya baby, if u sick, u noe who to call??
N A D HHHH II RRRAAHHHH laa. (:
aku paling benci kalau demam !! feeling2 so HOT HOT HOT !*ala2 lagu so hot by wonder girls*
bile dpt 3days MC, wahhh. mcm tk nk alek keje lagi seyyyyy! how i wish....... dream on la nad!
Alhamdulillah me and bf recovered from those sicknesssss. now very healthy can even woogie boogie woogieee!! haaaaahaaaahaaa.

anyway, been thinking lately about my big dayyy. haiyah, stress u noe. Alhamdulillah bf is around to guide me thru and along the way. I thank u for that dear. i just wish that it will go on smoothly and happily and bubbly and funny and hippyy hippyyyy. heehee. we settled half of the stuffs already for the bbq and barang kering2. feeling so sexciteddd. hopefully the plans will turn out well. yahooooo. few more days baby. i cant wait! but very funny u noe. i noe la my bf trying to be sweet enuf to surprise me for that event. hahaha. out of all the surprises, 2 of it was guessed by me! haha. how? not actually guess la. the people yg dier pakat2 together tu, mulot susah nk keep secret. abess la. hahahahaha. cute la baby i.. cant stop thinking how "smart" putera mohd daud nie.. ;P nevertheless, im still stress regarding everything. takotttt.. eee..
gonna get the other half of the stuffs settle by next week. insyallah.
so the one invited, please make this happen guys. biase laa. akak(adek), just turning 21!! likee duhhhhh.

so ya, months was spend almost everyday with bf. splendid like hell. watched movies together most of the time. the recent was the hangover. kekek pe cite tuuuu! haha. ouh yes, talking bout that, we gonna catch UP today.. yippyyy ya yeahhh! was hell waiting for this show since last 2months tauu! be jealoussss! haha. and so, time spend with him was like spending time with an angel and abit of devil. sometimes, most of the time like devil!! mcm nk smack jeeee pantat kau yayang! haha. ouh well, cinta katekan.. kadang ketawe, kadang gembire.
6months of ups and downsss. cant deny it. but im glad and greatful to have u in my life now. Alhamdulillah kite sampai ke tahap ni. im praying for the best of the best to cum. Amin.
just recieved call from him. he got the tickets alreadyyyy! 2130hrs at cathay! okay, nad stop it! get some rest first yayang at home and see u later. yeah! he's fetching me! double happinesss!
((:

last week end was over at my abg sdare's place to celebrate his wedding. slept over on Saturday at kak shika's place then off to abg aidil's place the next morning. Alhamdulillah the wedding went on smoothly and steadily. very pretty arrangements and people. photos with kak shika for now. dunno wen can i get it frm her. haiyah. && there was a lil surprise for me and the other August babies during the wedding ceremony. imagine dat.
djay: "shika" and "dhirah" sila hadir ke hadapan.
we was likeeee huhhhh???
kak ani planned it all. haha. soo cute. small cupcakes was presented to us. tk lupe jugak dgn obek2 aku yg birthday falls on Aug jugak was there to sing along the bday song with us. urgh. so cute indeed. thanks kak ani for that sweet and special surprise. advance bday pressy. weee~
after the wedding is done, we slacked awhile over abg aidil's house. between both familiesss. we ate oleh2 yg dibwk oleh org2 seberang tambak. den ate duriannnnss. fuh! I likeee! then we ended the day at 2000hrs plus. was tiring till i have to seek urgent leave from work the next day. congrats abg aidil and kak ogy! make babiesss soon! hehe. (:

what elseee to update ehh..
yes oh yessss! ive started jogging session with my girls and a gay(An) since last 3weeks. but not bad la kan. im loving it. jogged around the clementi swimming complex on Mon,Wed and Fri.
but as for me, i only managed to do 2 jogging sessions only due to the other time i was down with fever so i have to skip it and this week, im tight with plans and stuffs. naseb ayan tk marah2 mcm mak2. nyehahaha. so to the ladies(Ct and Ayan), i'll be back tomorrow! CANT WAITTTT!! i'll beat ur 10 rounds Ayannnn! heehee. regarding my gay fren, An, joking only la. he's not even a MAN ! haha. due to his bulu mate, i always call him BABYGIRL. bulu mate dier lentekk kauuu! healthy us for now.(currently,LOL).

whats more ehhh..
my uncle is getting married this coming weekend and i wonder how the situation will be like.
arghh. i jus hate to gather with my family frm my dad's side. too tertutop ah. rase mcm kat jail tau. haiz. but still, have to attend with pretending smiley faces on my face! hopefully it will be a fast one and an enjoyable one la pleassseee! or elseee! aku confirm sedih. excited tho to see cik tahar naik pelamin! hehe. seriously, tk caye dier nk kahwinnn! & i haven visit my dad's mother since last raye. always like dat la. of course, she gonna nag and nag and nag at me. biasela, org tua katekan. i just dun feel right when im with my dad's family. only God noes why. ):
& bf plan to join Akim to dbl O for his bday bash or sumthing. dunno whether bf wanna really go or not. by then, i sure gonna be very busyyy next week. no more spending money. must remind myself.

update again soon with lotsa pictures ya.
some of the pictures..

on Saturday, the nikah day. me and shikkaaaa.

shika, kak ana, dhirah and kak ani. (:

mentel.

the bday surprise. cute kannnn!

bday babies.

my happy family. the candid mode.

dats all for now.

i so cant waait for that show.

ily putera mohd.

have a good day lovelies! (:

2009-06-26T22:33:00.000-07:00

right now, im in the service room at Genome with Budi, Aliman and Linda. planned was to play the net till evening. tapi Man mcm siakkk! nk watch wujud 2.5 !
so i paused.

huhuhu.
okay la not dat bad la kan.
scary memang scary jugak siol.

anyway, sometimes i felt very lazy to blog but i stil want to blog.
so how?
i shall continue.

last saturday was spend with nurul asyikin, my bestie and sista, linda.
we chilled at vivo.
shop, eat, shop and shoppp !
haha.
i spend almost two hundred plus on that day.
got a surprise for my darling.
pants from ripcurl.
hope u will like it dear. i noe u will !!!!!!!
(:
thanks nurul for that sweet meetup dgn muke kau yg sweet tk abes2 !
and of course, jiyah gonna be very mad at me for not meeting her at her place.
and i went m.i.a. sorrrrry.
aku akan make it up to u. serious.
jiyah jgn marah2 please.
here's the pictures for that sweet saturday.

my sweetgirl, nurul.

the other day, i went to zoo.
with my boy of course.
and one more couple, jas & lily.
we met up at 11plus am and headed down to the zoo.
sumpah nad jakon nk mampos.
i was super duper happy.
since bf got the membership card frm cisco and my leave was approved, apee lagi kan..
i miss zoo so much.

i was the map reader for that day.
sexcited of course .
we actually went to every part of the zoo except for the kids world area.
the weather wasnt that good. it was hujan kucing dan anjing.
geram tapi we didnt stop and give up.
we did stopped for awhile then continue to meet the animals.
seriously i was damn shocked to see a seamang hanging freely on top of the tree.
takot tapi nk tengok jugak !
since my digicam's batt wasnt in the good mood, i used my handphone's camera instead.
i took videos and ALOT of pictures.
haha.
i had soo much fun baby !
thanks to u.
i wish i cud upload the pictures today.
after zoo, we went to sungai kadut for awhile to get bf's bike chain done.
we was semi drenched by the time we reached there.
lily was being super eeeee when she tried to pitpot my nose !
and yes, she did. cute la dier.
geraaam aku !
all set and done, we then proceed to vivo.
for what purpose??
haha, TRANSFORMERS movie laaaaa.
hehe. imma happy girl on that wednesday !
(:
we had dinner at LJS then chilled at the sky garden(am i correct?) and i leave bf with them.
nad go shopping alone. LOL.
i went to the washroom then off to chamelon at basement2.
got my stuffs then back to see them.
a ciggy for me and its time to watch the movie.
since we booked our tickects much more earlier than the actual date the movie was out, we skip the hassle to queue up to get them.
& sooo, transformers is kinda great and two thumbs up for the movie maker.
megan foxxxx is the sex man. i still can remember how bf look at her when she appeared on the screen ! babbbbyyy ! im cool. dats common wattt.
anyway, i slept five mins during the show. haha. i guess all of the watcher did pun.
the show quite draggy pun ade. but way too cool and cute la the autobots. geramm !

i hate the feeling when i have to end the day with my baby.
sumpah, i enjoyed it very much.
nk lagi nk lagi nk lagi !
n yes, baby not deploy in biopolis anymore due to the H1N1 thingy.
meaning, aku da tk leh nmpk dierrr laa !
babi kan mcm tuuu.
and he was like makangajibute since last monday. on standby mode katekan.

&& right now, i was left all alone typing this script out.
BUDI, MAN and LINDA are sleeping right now ! blardyyy mangkok kan.
i guess i sud join them too and wait for baby to come back from JB.
i miss him.
and i think the redbloodedwoman is coming to me soon.
cos i can feeel it.
do not disturb mode.
thankuverynice.

have a happy weekend guys. (:

ilovemyputera.

2009-06-16T04:44:00.000-07:00

UHH LALALA.
TGIF baby.
stil have to go to work tomorrow. blearghhhh~

anyways, work was okay okay jugak like always. 80% slacking je. another 20% focus on visitors. dorg la harapan. slagi
dorg tk dtg, slagi tu la nad tkde keje nk buat !
actually by rite we've got this daily checklist thingy to do. but by left, i always finish it up at the end of the month.
slagi supervisor tk sound nk collect, slagi tu la aku tk bergerak ! nyehaha.
cool pe keje aku. sape nk keje? n u get the chance to gain weight u noe ! ape tak ! makan makan dudokkkk je all the way!
i got to do something with my body already. yesyes, i realy mean it ! n bf, he's with me. he will be my personal trainer!
hehe. no more junk foods he say. must exercise more. we gonna have jogging sessions soon ! yes!! I CAN DO IT ! (:

i have alot to update. first up, wan's farewell.
sedih banget loh wan(genome's premas blk technician) left all of us in biopolis. smue sentimentel i tell u. he's the one
who put smiles on our faces everyday without fail. he love to tease people. he love to make lawak bodoh. he likes to talk to me
in boyan and i will replied back in boyan for no fcking reason. he's adorable ! when we get to know that he will be leaving
us, hati satu2 smue sayu. espcially my sista, Linda. they both work together under the same building(Genome). Linda is
the receptionist for Genome and Wan is the technician. we have to communicate well with technicians. without fail everyday,
confirm de contractors dtg nk jumpe blk tech. we're like one big family already. of cos i've got my own one and only blk
tech in my building(Matrix). which is Aliman, of course. i can feel it sista. i cant imagine if Aliman were to get outta bio
too. ouh well, life still gotta move on.
but seriously, it's a total diff now without having Wan around in bio. All the best Wan ! Babi kau, da wat kite gembire
tros tinggalkan kite ! Kahkeh betnah !(inside joke,haha!)
of course we had our last outing together with him. We went to bowl rite after work at West Coast R.C and had late dinner
at Ayer Rajah food court. Lastly, the touching moment. Surprises and lil gifts we got for him.
Small token of appreciation krane sudi menjadi kawan kite. LOL. He was moved by that. I still cant believe it.
He tried to cover by saying, "siak ah tu mama, tadi goreng mee chilli banyak sangat, mate aku pedih". PADAHAL2 !!
all of us(the ladies) cried of course. the guys step nk maintain je ! skali aku sikuu kang !
it was fun and meaningful moment for all of us. GOODLUCK A-WAN(all the aunties cleaner called him)! haha.
non stop photo taking session.

A-WAN.

inside the bus. otw to westcoastr.c.

geng2 biopolis main bowling. my nick is so cute. thanks eh wan!

our very own asyik masok longkang je bola playas. HAHA !

they rock my world.

the makan time.

touching mouching ah.

thats from me. limitd edition M&M's tau !
each of us bought chocs for him.
biar lagi gemokkk kauu ! lol.

dats from my sista. the biggest.
check out the chocs he got on the bottom left. banyak peee.

sad.

nie lagi sad!
CREDITS TO ME, AYAN & BUDI FOR THE LIL IDEA WE GOT FOR HIM. thanku. (:
(masok bakul, ape lagi.. angkat bakul tu sendiri laa)

the other time, i had dinner with love ones at Al-Azhar at Bkt Timah to celebrate belated Mother's Day for
stepmum. sista was the planner. it will be my turn for Father's day alright. i still haven decide what to get for Ayah.
i wanna surprise him laaa ! mayb cupcakes to be send to his workplace so he cud share those cuppies with other fathers
too. hehe. gd idea right. ermm.
back to the story.
it's been awhile since we kua makan same2. as usual, Ayah came in late. the cutiest part of all is that, family
members alot wore red on that day. not forgetting my cute stepbro who saw me wearing Man United's jersey and he then asked,"
mcm bosia tk pakai same2 baju?". definitely, i said,"NO! pakai ah cepat!".
haha. to my surprise, Ayah wore Man United's jersey too. but the 'legend' version. sponsor frm umbro. whereas me & nizam's, sponsored
by NIKE. i had a gd lauf when i teased Ayah. nizam decided to take public so ape lagi, camwhored with him inside the bus.
Happy Belated Mummy's Day to my sista, Linda and mama, Fauziah.
eventhough we are not from the same blood, i still love u both like hell okay. i dun care ! u both da mcm my own family !
and thanks for everything right from the start i came into your life. i appreciated all the love, care and concern u guys
showed me. im showered with much love by them. people usually say, stepfamiy is the one that i've got to be careful off.
not in my dictionary yo people. they're my family. get that and beat that ! mayb sumtimes things didnt go in the right direction
and we cant blame it on anyone. da takdir. but im trully glad im part of them. imma happy girl. i have lotsa families.
hehe. && im the youngest okay ! so yah, da terang2 babe. manjeee !! not really la actually.
once again, STAY SWEET, HAPPY AND HOTTY TO BOTH MY MOTHERS & TO ALL THE SISTAS OUT THERE! so the belated la ehh.
who cares!
here's the pixies.

inside the bus. otw to bkt timah.my stupid stepbro. haha.

his clever stepsista. :O

cool or wat this pic. glorygloryMANUNITED. !!

my sista, Linda with her lil' strawberryshortcake, Qistina.

charlie's angel c'mon !i'm in between mother & daughter yoo!

satu family. (:

i still haf one more story to tell.
hehe.
last thurs, our very first time partey-ing together. haha. wasnt really plan to go as for me la. but this itchy mouth
TERtanye lagi. padahal we was frm town after watching drag me to hell(got the first row,scary sumore.haf to watch okay)
he send me home since the next day i'll be working. da smpai jurong
nie, i go opened my mouth, begitu jugak bf U TURN. haha. n dats the reason y i didnt turn up for work the next day. LOL.
we was dancing & laughing at the same time. kekek abess. bf's fren, Fad's bday on that night. so we joined la.
5648691019303years sey didnt party. nah, the last one was with Jiyah & An at Zouk last 3months. -.- imtooheavytodanceaalready.hahahuhuhaha.
another first time event the next day, i had karaoke session with my boy. haha. afterwhich i took MC for that day,back home then off
to cuppage cash family studio. bf booked at 1630, sampai nye kul 1700. hoho. my fault of course! siap mcm tkde org tunggu
gtuk. sorrrryyyyy. ):
tk penah terlintas pun nk go such place with him. but it turned out to be jus fine n nice of course.
i can feel that we are having so much fun and i wish we cud jus sing all night long.
baby, u are so cute that day. malu2 kucing at the start but very loud through the ending.
i like it so much. thank u once again for putting smiles on my face since day one! u cant seems to stop making me happy
and all smiley isnt it? jangan yang. later penat, i dunno ehh. later both take MCs ah(inside joke,haha!).
iloveyousomuchbaby.
after the K-OK, met Jas&gf, lepak at J.east esso den off to East Coast park. not only us la. but with Jas's Mcriders.
they went to bowl. so me, bf, Jas&gf went to chilly chill. okla, at least i've got the chance to have lil' chats with bf's frens.
im friendly kan baby? hee. & i can be supa talkative ! (: hobby la. ape nk buat. i jus hup i cud fit in the crowd.
smue krane lu la putera mohd! tapi ikhlas, dun worry. ((:
photos at k-ok and the day before to cineleisure to watch DRAGMETOHELL.

cineleisure. I'MSOFAT. ( - . - )

before heading off to cuppage.

cuppage family cash studio. my hero. +;+

his supergirl.

us.

ilovethispic. (:

penyanyi sehari! ;p

my penyanyok.

org sebok menyanyi, aku sebok tangkap glamour. LOL.

we had a happy week, yes we did.
but this week, na-uh.

plane crashing beside me,
fireworks stop for me to see.
i wish i cud jus sleep and bring you in,
u might wanna know when my dreams become so real.
i tuned on the radio to hear the sound,
the love that i lost,inside u I found.
drop the wind,
hit the sparks.
tell where where i stop
cos baby, this feeling really sucks.

bf learnt the truth.
i wasnt enjoying any moments like this.
he tried his best to stay positive and free from making harsh decisions.
tell ya the truth, im still not ready if he were to open up this topic again.
but im all prepared for the worse.
i admitted that it was my fault for not telling the truth right from the start.
u know when u love someone so much and u are afraid that the words might hurt them, u would just wait till they find out about it. dats not something u sud do, precisely.
i want my partner to be as perfect as he can be. love me as much as i love him.
everyone in this world is not perfect too.
and so, everything came back to me. EVERYTHING.
all those little lies i kept away from him. yes, he found out the truth by himself.
as i said, i was waiting for him to ask me to confess cos i honestly cant jus open it up to tell him.
the case of the ex, of cos.
im sorry that ive hurt u.
i know that ive told u before to stay faithful and honest towards this relationship.
i sud be telling it to myself. i know baby. i know.
he was seriously upset i can tell. it hurts badly.
he trusted me all this while. there sudnt be any secrets between us.
but i betrayed those trusts.
im feeling so remorseful dear. i just wanna be by ur side.
i dun want u to leave me now.
bf is a calm type of person. when he knew about it, he didnt shout nor he scream at me.
he do things slowly without hurting anyone. he asked me nicely.
our arguements usually lasted for about 5-10 mins then we will be back as per norm. i miss those times.
we talked about this yesterday, today and everyday.
he admitted too that he's not perfect and that he did mistakes too which i already all time ago
forgave him. it was uneasy too.
kadang kale kite gembire tapi kadang kale kite pun kene rase kedukaan nye jugak.
i really hope my baby wont feel upset anymore and please dun make him feel sad about this cos
i dun mean to hurt u sayang. im lost. i dun wanna give any excuses for this but i know that he knows i love him with all my heart and soul.
once again, Siti Nadhirah Bte S menyusun sepuloh jari memohon ampun dan maaf kpade
Putera Mohd Daud Ya Hakim Bin A krane telah menyakiti hatinya dan telah mengingkari janji kita berdua. Takde niat untuk berbuat demikian. Akan ku bukti kan sgalanya kpadamu krane dikaulah pujiaan hati ku.
Alhamdulillah, we're back again, connecting back the loosen wires and throwing away all unused datas.
I'll be meeting him tomorrow and let's have some fun baby.
Thank u for giving me another chance darling.

Sea and mountain,
Cloud and sun,
Baby is my darling,
Evrything seems so fun.
Shadows fades and memory stay,
U're too wonderful that price cant pay.
Hunting the time as birds fly,
I will bring u up to the sky.
May our love stay strong and healthy,
Here a lil' poem from u Nutty Baby.

Iloveyousomuch.
Imissyoutoo.
((:

&& yes jiyah & hanx,
meet ur guys tomorrow!
wuhooo. gaji kite da masssoookk !

GOODYGOODNIGHTYNIGHT PEOPLEEE!!

2009-05-29T05:04:00.000-07:00

hey there !
i jus came back from.. what they call that ??
WORK ehh? haha.
& TGIF man !!
yahooo!
slalu tk look forward for weekend but tomorrow, its a MUST !
nyehaha.
nk date with my babyyyy !
alah, his off days yg fall on weekend is only on this month je tau !
so must date !

so work is okay okay je tadi.
wat a BLESS day to start with as i saw my baby walking*insert model's walk* right infront of my eyes.
he had to stay a lil' longer just now. pity u !
but nvm la, u get to see me right ?
fair enuf isnt it?
;p
after love went back home, i felt so lonely even when Adi was there to entertain me.
sampai dier ckp, "nad rabak sak.. aku bebual kau tk pandang pun! kalau Jumaidi Bin Abdul Razak bebual, pandang sini!". haha.
i dunno why aku naik malas nk pandang muke org bile bebual.
maybe part of the PMS thingy kot !
guess sooo. -.-
but i managed to persuade him to share the Mcdonald's delivery charge since it's a waste if i were to purchase jus that & pay that huge amount of delivery charges !
eh halor ! 3bucks pun duit tau !
saaayyaanng oi !!
eh sala. i managed to get Kalai, Adi & Aliman to pay for the d charge. Hee.
Nad soo clever ! (:
tot of getting the breakfast meal skali they against me sey.
so yarr, had Mc Spicy Meal & Milo macflurry for lunch !
soodappp !!

the whole morning to afternoon till evening was slacking at the counter doing nothing but surfing the net with my ipood.
played games which my yayang downloaded for me yesterday while he's at work.
thank u much dear.
the games was indeed challenging, funny and even SEXXAYY.
nanti uu !
i ketok kpale u!
sape2 yg ade ipod touch, go n download peek a boo nye game n u noe why !
setan !
but funny la. hee.
dun worry, i tk marah. i cume nk cubit u sket jek. meh yang siniii kau !
*insert evil's smile*
& i dunno even ever check on his FB or whatsoeva.
but too bad, he installed FB inside my ipood.
there u go, i clicked n saw sumthing sweeett.
hee.
tk tau lak u got insert abit bout us inside there.
if i were u, i tk do all that pun.
hee. okay, im JOKING.
ntah2 i lagi semangat !
anyhoos, sweet of u la Putera M. Daud !
wait for my FB to be ready okay.
then check my contacts confirm full of guys !! *insert sexy voice*
tk la ! tpu je la !
still not sure whether to do FB or not. i'll try cos they said its cool.
let's see how cool FB is !

i so cant wait for tomoorow !
plan was to movie then to.. okay, i think we stopped there ah tadi.
hee.
i'll just wait n see.
i miss going out with him. padahal hari2 jumpe(almost).
nk go Ben & Jerry's again can tk ??
-.-'

let's upload pics from the previous time when we travelled to Ben & Jerry's at Dempsey Hill.
fun. fun. fun.

before going to B&J's. i like this pic.
dier mcm cited. SEXCITED. excited. haa.

dun mind me guys. too excited i guess. -'''-

okay, aku da rilek da. tk excited sangat okay.

torn among the roses.

enjoyzing rightttt.. if im not wrong, we had.. omg ! i forget la sey ! haiyah !

the rose among the horny tornies. :p

of cos i left the place with a S M I L E ee ee eeEE..

the place was damn packed. but lucky for us, we didnt have to wait that long & lucky for me that i got the chance to sit on the cradle-like sit. ntah la ape dorg panggil name krusi tu.
& we caught ourselves fighting over that buai !
jus cos i dun wan Putera to sit together with me on that buai !
mak oi ! dgr2 aku ringan pe !
tkde confidence langsong okay !
but at last, i did sat together with him on it !
sayang punye pasal tau !
we had cheese fries & calamari before we get the taste of the iceee creeaaam.
damn, i felt so full after dat.
& he love it when i go like.. "baby, atet elooott.." & he will rub my cute tummy with much love !
dier suke confirm pasal muke aku yg memek nie bile ckp sentence tu. LOL.
thanks for bringing me there yang after so long persuading. iloveyoumuch!

now waiting for mum to finish cooking.
very hungaaarrrreeeyyy liao.
i'll leave u for now dear diary.
see u wen i see u okay.

Happy working honey. Hug u tomorrow ! *insert ready open arms for tomorrow*
ishk, I MISS U TOO MUCH & SO MUCH !
takecare love. (:

see! how can i not miss him? He's my teaser, joker, tonguetwister(haha) and everything that ends with -ER.

okay, gootey buyee. 0'-'0

2009-05-28T09:33:00.000-07:00

good morning people.
hehe.
currently chatting with babylove n jiyah baby.
orang2 gile yg still awake. hee.

anyway, im on MC today !!
i repeat, im on MC todayyy !!
haha.
da 2 bulan aku tk buat keje gnie tau !
not that i want to really do it la but ive got no choice.
i will look like a zombie sitting at my counter if i go to work tadi.
me n babylove met kamal yesterday morning at his place.
da lame tk nmpk anak tu. windu banget.
by looking at his face je can make me laugh already.
he used to work at bio as the security officer.
da wat org bahagie, tros cabot ! babi.
oh well, he got a new job liao. as a PESTER.
am i right baby? oh sala eh?
Peter Pest laa.
haha. org yg bunuh tikus2 dan segale binatang sewaktu dgn nye.
KAMAL PEMBUNUHHH !
all the best buddy.
we left for home at around 4am like dat.
n home sweet home with darling. nyehahaha.
i likeeeee.

went to the doctor's clinic right on time.
4.30pm tu dier nk tutop, time tu jugak kite sampai.
ape lagi, bising ah nyonya recep tu. LOL.
dier memang one kind ah.
got my MC den grabbed some food before babylove send me home.
oh ya, sempat send food for stepmum & stepbro.
wah ! anak and adek yg solehah kan aku?
hee.
babylove went to work after sending me.
part mane yg sedih tu ??
hmmp !
i was left alone at home. chey! mcm la tk biase kan.
yes, i am missing him rite now.

oh yes, before i lupe.
got something to share ! hee.
last sunday,
i surprised babylove with gifts n cuppies.
hehe.
planned it before i even get my pay.
aku slalu semangat. aku tau.. -.-
the plan went smoothly but only that initially the plan was to surprise him the cuppies bile kite dudok pat esplanade.
but since the time we had tk mencukupi, i asked Lina(the cupcake's maker) to send it at Marina Square instead.
thanks to her fiancee to pecot just to send the cuppies before our movie starts.
Alhamdulillah.
met her awhile leaving babylove alone and there u go baby..
taaadaaaa. i was blushing non stop !
sape tk blush kau !
first time doing this for him.
i created a d.i.y card for him filled with lotsa love & love & love tauuu !
u see for urself & tell me okay !
& i got him the bag that he wanted. from 4skin.
i randomly pick Levis belt instead of the key pouch that he was looking for.
tkde la yang. sorry horr.
of cos, he doesnt know that im surprising him with the stuffs that he wanted all this while.
i hope u still like it dear !
sumpah, on that day jugak he used the bag.
dier humban bag crumpler kecik dier pat dalam.
smuee jalan teros baby nie !

after unleashing the dragon. LOL.

the D.I.Y card i've made.

the cuppies.
credits to Lina yg menjadi aku gf nye rossi ! haha.

already ready to use the bag. cute la sangat budak nie ! eee !

the surpriser. *insert evil's laugh*

me & baby put!

dat's my very own m.daud kilau. okay, sorry baby kilau. heeee.

last cuppy for the day !

yours truly deeply doooo...

my gifts is not as meaningful as wat he has given me.
apart from the love care & concern he gave,
he did pampered me alot.
the last surprise he gave me was a mobile phone.
which i trully adore & wanting to get it wen i got enuf cash.
but instead, putera bought it & surprise me while sitting at Esplanade.
he was talking bout this surprise which starts with a letter 'E' which i dun even get his slightest clue bout it. first thing that came out in my mind was E for ELEPHANT. haha.
part mane yg kelaka kalau dier nk kasi ELEPHANT pat aku ah?
den i even asked Aliman & Kalai.
they said earrings la, earphones la.. & bla bla blaaaaa..
so wen putera fetched me after work on that day, the first thing is see was his helmet beg.
see whether the size got like elephant ke. LOL.
but NO !
mulot aku tk reti diam along the way to Esplanade. asyik tanye je non stop. hee.
SEXCITED gtuk loh !
so yarr, here i am happily owning a E63 Nokia mobile phone while he's still stuck with his da-rosak-mintak-kene-buang china phone.
see the sacrifices u did baby ??
& im thank u for that.
THANKS again dear for that surprise u made up for me.
reallyyyy trumbling like hell la wen opening the present frm him.
i was looking up the sky all the way sia sambil open it.
there, i felt so scared pun ade, malu pun ade, nk nangis pun ade.
sumpah, telalu cepat untok aku dapat hadiah mcm nie dari dier.
haizz.
sayaaaaaaaang ayaaaaaaaang !!!
nk surprise lagiiii ! hee.
*smack my own forehead*
LOL.

remember 'E' stands for 'E63' not ELEPHANT ! -.-'
n baby said its equivalent to me. oh yes it is !!

i better go to bed now.
its 0240am liao.
goodnight jiyah. goodnight baby.
& goodnight everyone. (:

2009-05-22T20:31:00.000-07:00

i've been editting this space of mine since yesterday night.
tapi tetap tk puas hati jugak. haha.
oh well, da lame sey tk blog!
since last year oi!
hehe.

since i've got back my lappy after sending it for servicing,
why not i start a new account right?
i miss blogging so blardy muchhy!
so here i am starting to manje2 back with this site.
watever.

anyway,
lotsa plans going on for today.
im going dinner with my stepfamily.
maybe to sakura which is at west coast.
belated mother's day celebration for her.
i'll be proceeding to orchard rd to meet adam, kak shika and my bro, shah for
KAOK session till morning.
haha.
dorg blanje! sape tknk! hee.

im kinda tired actually.
gonna get some rest first later before the dinner.
hopefully i dont overslept sudah la.
lol.

i miss my baby put.
i think he's asleep right now.
was waiting for ur call seyyy.
called ur house pun tk angkat!
hmmp.
cant wait to meet u tomorrow.
sini kauuuu !

i've got nothing much to say currently.
so yah, will be hopping in again soon.
hopefully.
nyehahaha.

pestie, relink me!
kau sorang la harapan bangse.
mcm biase jugak, i miss you la minah.
part mane yg best eh dok umah lagi tkya keje??
babi kau!
(:

tell her i miss her.

& tell him that i miss him too.

love, nad.

2009-05-22T08:53:00.000-07:00

goodnight.